Category: Poetry
Poetry is one of my passions. In my blog, I will publish poems which I wrote. Hence I opened a separate category for poetry.
During the years, I’ve read Italian, English, American, and French poems because, during my childhood, I learned those three languages. Only recently, I started writing poetry which I never wanted to publish. I believe that it is very personal to publish them.
Although I’m a physicist, I started to read poetry during high school, mainly in Italian and English. Only home I was reading French books. Indeed, the French language and literature were not in my school program.
Writing poetry is one of the most intimate ways to express feelings and moods. Time to time, I will publish poems.
-
A Lonely Star In The Universe
In the light blue sky, the clouds move fast as the wind passes through them
-
Shyness
Shyness
Shyness is one of the several gems that are held inside the treasure of my soul
I would permanently hide this side of myself with a smile rather than being paralysed by fear
It is the softness and sweetness of my dreamy essence
It is part of my delicacy and femininity
My soul is similar to a piano nocturne
My shyness would conceal my authentic nature, which is a blend of Romanticism and Victorian era
Sometimes I would identify myself in some painting
As if I would belong to a previous reality
Hence I would disappear amid my dreams
Lost in the sublimity and beauty of the universe.
Esther Racah -
The Scent Of My Dreams
The Scent Of My Dreams
The scent of my dreams is like a Chopin nocturne
The sumptuous and opulent scent of tuberose and jasmine surround me
Impregnating my body and my hair
And I dream of being away in a place where I can feel protected
Forgetting everything and everyone
All the old and abusive memories would disappear
Finally, I would be free from intrusive thoughts and flashbacks
Sometimes I thought that I deserved every kind of anguish
Just because I would feel at peace with myself and with my oppressors
I never needed their love and attention as I thought
Nevertheless, they needed me.
Esther Racah -
A Burnt Life
A Burnt Life
A burnt life has left me behind
Shallow emotions would be forgotten
Grief would leave a mark in my heart
Because of all the traumas I had to bear all life
It is suggested to be insensitive in this existence
Because they would not understand all the damages left in my mind and heart
They would see me just as a body without a soul
I was just a high-grade intelligent entity with a bunch of degrees
All the suffering and agonies were buried in the deepest place of my soul
I was too sensitive, too unusual, too brilliant
Hence I had to do much more than others
I always had to be the perfect role model
Nevertheless, I was all alone in my anguishes
There was no empathy
There was no connection
And it was as if the sky had suddenly fallen on me, and the stars were burning out
In the secrecy of the dark despair, I was left alone, and pains were stabbing my heart like tiny sharp daggers
I always had as loyal companions my books
Being lonely, it was the only refuge where I would spend hours
Archaeology, Physics, Biology, Literature and Philosophy were my favourite topics
And I would enjoy reading in English, Italian and French
A burnt life without escapes entrapped me for a long time
Leaving me with scars and awful remembrances.
Esther Racah -
Like A Porcelain Doll
Like A Porcelain Doll
And it was like in a nightmare
While I was lying inert on a cold bed like a porcelain doll
I could not conceive why those things happened for a reason
Maybe I was too naive to realise such closeness
Perhaps I was too childish to protect myself
Letting the submission paralyse my mind
It never mattered who I really was
It never mattered what I really desired
Because the most important thing was social etiquette and fulfilled other’s desires
I had to embellish myself like a porcelain doll
I had to smile with my elegant dresses and impeccable makeup devotedly
Some pretty bow in my long blond hair and a sumptuous dress as a daily routineI was empty, and I could not find myself
Being constantly busy to be submissive and amiable
Exhausted and broken
I was never good enough
And then, I had to lose myself
Becoming who I was expected to be
The echo of my silence was loud in my mind
The only place where I was feeling safe
Respect and love were remote chimaeras
The coldness around me was freezing my heart
My feelings being trapped in a desperate endeavour to be loved
And trying to piece together scattered fragments of myself.
Esther Racah
-
Regrets
Regrets
Regrets are painful longings for a lost part of myself
And like shadows, they obscure my secret rose garden
Introspection is nothing but a useless speculation
My desire is a burning longing for ideal and eternal love
In my dreams, the stars have whispered secrets to me that cannot be revealed
Secrets that I know very well but I will never reveal
So terrible to even think about themOnce I was too tiny to understand and react
And I was too astonished and everything too tragic to understand
Often and suddenly, they come into my mind
My femininity and fragility are my shields
Sometimes a wicked irrationality dominates my mind
There is nothing to be done to undo the past
And regrets are just useless vexations.
Esther Racah -
An Inextinguishable Flame
An Inextinguishable Flame
It burns me inside like an inextinguishable flame
The desire for unpredictability and unexpectedness
Passions and dreams induce me to explore my unconsciousness
My fragility and my vulnerability are the shadows of my dismay
The more I know about myself, the more I want to embrace the obliviousness
The more I learn, the more I become doubtful
Whenever I embrace the risk of losing what I care about the most in life
Persistent aches grasp my heart, and I abandon myself to the madness of my senses.
Esther Racah
-
I Don’t Like Writing
I Don’t Like Writing
I don’t like writing
Nevertheless, it is an unavoidable activity for me, such as breathing
As long as silence talks to me, many impressions crowd into my mind
Often I stay idle, wondering about random ideas
But I am not able to rationalise all that is inscrutable
It is as time shows me life in pictures
Like a collection of many old miniature paintings
Some of them are blurred
And others are very unambiguous
All those words of mine give only sporadic impressions about myself
All those poems of mine are only fragments of me
My poetry is accessible for everyone to read
My poetry is not trapped in a book
My poetry is absolutely a wild living thing that breaths
Hence, I chose the freedom to express myself straightforwardly.
Esther Racah
-
Without Darkness
Without Darkness
Without darkness, there wouldn’t be light
Without sadness, there wouldn’t be happiness
The myth of false positivity and happiness at any cost
It is just a hypocritical way to betray the honesty of the mind
Just like a good filler makeover and a fake smile
This life became a tragicomedy where real people act like ridiculous clownsNowadays, everything is so fictitious
Nowadays, everything is so falsely bright
The philosophy of being happy and embrace the light
It’s the new propaganda to conceal all the fears and problems
The main is to be a shallow mentor, showing off and impressing
It is just a blind society where there is no way to avoid rooted ignorance.
Esther Racah -
My Innermost Thoughts
My Innermost Thoughts
Sometimes I remember much more that I would need
Sometimes I would prefer not to write at all
In this way, I don’t reveal anything about myself
Each time I express my emotions with my penned words
It is like I expose myself showing my innermost thoughts
Taking off all those numerous protective garments enwrapping meI was born to bear grief and anguishes silently
Pretending that nothing happened
Pretending that everything would be the outcome of my imagination
Life is a delightful mystery and gift
It would be easier to obscure the reality with the darkness of my dreams
Since only in the gloomy dreams I can find my peaceful haven.
Esther Racah