Category: Poetry

Poetry is one of my passions. In my blog, I will publish poems which I wrote. Hence I opened a separate category for poetry.

During the years, I’ve read Italian, English, American, and French poems because, during my childhood, I learned those three languages. Only recently, I started writing poetry which I never wanted to publish. I believe that it is very personal to publish them.

Although I’m a physicist, I started to read poetry during high school, mainly in Italian and English. Only home I was reading French books. Indeed, the French language and literature were not in my school program.

Writing poetry is one of the most intimate ways to express feelings and moods. Time to time, I will publish poems.

Emptiness

Emptiness

I feel an emptiness that depletes my mind
I cannot find any word to express my weakness
Trying to express thoughts with words and linking words in sentences
I’m in a cage of void and numbness
No one can rescue me but myself
To free my mind
My thoughts would follow an order
And my mind would have the strength to reveal itself
Indifference and emptiness create a barrier around me
Prejudices occlude minds and confines individuals
Thus I find refuge in the literature and poetry
Although they can deceive me
They are pleasant dreams and delusions which allow me to endure
Books are my several worlds I live in
Several worlds where I can live different experiences
And where I can meet several characters
Discovering several places and epochs
Poetry is my only personal expression where I can be myself
Sometimes I lose myself in the emptiness of the reality
Which I push away in the effort to survive
My sensibility and my sensitivity suffer
From a painful system that is made of stereotypes and prejudices
Labels and classifications are the foundation of a hypocrite society
A society that is ridiculous and absurd
Sometimes more foolish than a fantasy book
Hence I find refuge in the emptiness which I feel
My secret haven in a realm that is made of horror and injustice
An empire that is built on corruption and deceit
Where a false smile is worth far more than a sincere sorrow
Believing in illusion is the only way to survive
My dungeon is my joyful refuge, where I can protect myself.
Esther Racah

August 2, 2020
Torn To Pieces

Torn To Pieces

I’ve been torn to pieces
Hidden in a silent alcove
I lost my integrity
The integrity which made me shine like a star
Now that I’m not anymore a shining star
I’m a fragment of myself
A piece whose beauty is lost
Once a tiny part of a beautiful artwork
Which is sinking in a vast ocean of despair
The despair of the uncertainty
Powerless to escape from this misery
I disappear into my fantasy
Where I can refuge
Like a beautiful and graceful butterfly
Running from a cruel reality
Which is like an obscure fortress
Where a labyrinth traps everything
A mysterious maze made of isolation and silence
An imperceptible and invisible fortress
A fortification that dwells inside the soul
A snare made of fears and prejudices
A lure built on grief and prostration
I’ve been torn to pieces
Sad hallucinations find a new stance
In the disruption of the unconsciousness
The time ceases to exist
Futile fears find their realm
A kingdom of rags and scraps
The pieces of my soul
Like the fragments of a shattered shining mirror
Whose several remnants shine in the moonlight.
Esther Racah

July 17, 2020
The Antique Door

The Antique Door

An antique door was standing in an abandoned castle
Surrounded by ancient and luxurious vestiges
While the seasons were dancing alternatively
This antique door was imperturbable
With its shy cracks and golden garnishes
It was standing quietly
Unaware of the weather’s changes
Careless about the sun and moon
Unaffected by the days and nights
Its imperfections were like embroideries
This relic was a luscious memory
The memory of a period that was lost
Light and dusk were creating beautiful artworks
Like artists painting on a canvas
Each day there was a different drawing
Different attitudes depict the soul with different colours
The soul is an artwork
A blank canvas which is ready to be painted
A painting sometimes may have some crack and imperfection
Nevertheless, imperfections are beautiful artful conceptions.
Esther Racah

July 7, 2020
The Abyss Of Memories

The Abyss Of Memories

Into the abyss of memories
I lie inert and motionless
Here no light can find a place
Because the darkness is overwhelming
The frail remembrances of a dusty past
A past which is a museum of frightening and exquisite paintings
Each of them portrays a different life instant
And I lie in this abstract place
A surrealistic chasm that keeps me captive
Hoping to find freedom from the abyss of memories
I laugh and cry
It doesn’t matter anymore what is real
Reality seems an illusion of my perceptions
In the end, I wonder what is illusory and what is real.
Esther Racah

June 23, 2020
Absolute Silence

Absolute Silence

My mind is blank
My emotions are frozen
And I remain motionless
Until the moment I can enjoy the absolute silence
I don’t need anymore to express myself with words
Every memory disappears
And I find myself in a state of peaceful bliss
I can enjoy the absolute silence
With no pains and no fears
No sounds can be perceived
Now that this bliss seems to be endless
I don’t feel any disquiet.
Esther Racah

June 10, 2020
Poetry

Poetry

My poetry is what makes me feel alive
I’m my own poetry
A ridiculous assemblage of floating words
Words that meet and embrace each other
In a vortex of feelings
Feelings that are expressionlessly shapeless and unworthy
I close myself into this microcosm to survive
To survive all the tragedies which overrun this world
And I cannot stop to tremble and be afraid of this society
A society that is made of hypocrisy
So I feel calm inside my sandcastle, waiting for a change
A change which is arduous to happen
I wander happily into the forest of my thoughts
And I surrender to the harmony of my passions
My emotions are like musical notes
They gather together to create a musical score
A musical score which is made of perceptions
I’m overwhelmed by my emotions
Feelings that keep hiding inside myself
Sadness and melancholy swirl around me like soft feathers
And they don’t leave me alone
Now that I abandon my rationality, embracing my sensibility.
Esther Racah

June 3, 2020
I Can Be Everything I Want

I Can Be Everything I Want

I can be everything I want
I can be nothing at all
I want to believe in illusions
I lose control of my mind like in a dream
Beyond the bounds of the time
I can float free in a chaotic ocean
The waves of a sea which is made of dreams
The dreams which follow me eternally
Even in the most profound desolation
Invisible as I am
Invisible as I feel to be
My voice is like the sound of a tiny raindrop
Falling into the deep and dark ocean
Nothing matters to me anymore
My thoughts and my words are insignificant
Thoughts that cause me to get lost
I can be everywhere I want
I can be nowhere at all
But only in my dreams
Where I can finally be myself
Anyone else but me can witness this illusion
My illusion which I call a dream
And which allows me to survive.
Esther Racah

June 2, 2020
A Silent Storm

A Silent Storm

A silent storm was brewing
I could not remember well
Since I was dizzy
It happened to be in a night
The silence was adorning my room
And I could hear the sounds of a storm
Faraway in a non-physical place
I couldn’t see lightning bolts
However, I could listen to the thunder
All that I could sense was my perturbed soul
So full of dark presages and emotions
This silent storm was dark and gloomy
It took possession of me
I couldn’t describe its intensity
Since my mind was dazed because of the despair
Prisoner of my emotions
I couldn’t say more than I’m writing now
Sensations blended in a daunting turmoil
With the impression and fear
To be swallowed up by a deep and endless sinkhole
Waiting for a peaceful haven
I was going to be powerless as a leaf on the wind.
Esther Racah

May 16, 2020
Hopeless

Hopeless

Hopeless as I feel
I perceive the emptiness of the dreams I didn’t realise
Because it was arduous to believe in them
Hence I have nothing to say but spare written words
Words that keep me alive and conscious
Nothing else is worthy of consideration
Nothing else is worthy of belief
Indeed every trust and hope is gone
And I live a lifeless existence made of aborted dreams
Dreams which are never going to be born
It is too complicated to achieve something in this life
It is too arduous to carry this burden alone
Pleasures are just an illusion of the mind
There are only sorrow and exhaustion
I am senseless and apathetic
Being surrounded by books and scattered notes
As I realise my inner silence
I can only succumb to the heaviness of their countless words
There is a lot to discover in ourselves
It is up to us to seek our inner peace and happiness
Many reasons give us the life we own
Few reasons can be intelligible
Since most of them are inexplicable
Although sometimes I feel hopeless, I rejoice in it
Indeed, I wouldn’t exist without my crushed dreams.
Esther Racah

May 7, 2020
Anymore

Anymore

I feel discontented
My soul wanders
Being aimless in every attempt to pretend a form of happiness
It is too ambitious to aspire for a serenity that got lost
Now and forever, the pains blend with all kinds of feelings
And writing is the only way to survive
Living in the poetry rhymes
Not human anymore
Not corporeal anymore
In this process, no physical sense takes part
The time stopped to breath
Day and night are melt
And the sun plays with the moon in the dizzy sky
My eyes are open, and I gasp, holding my breath
My feelings are frozen
I cannot perceive any physical sensation
My mind is in confinement
And my only liberty dwells in my silent words
Scattered like water drops on a meadow
My lyrics are free to fly away from the absurdity of this physical world.
Esther Racah

May 3, 2020