Esther Racah Writer & Literary Blogger

Tag: decay

  • The Death In Front Of Me

    The Death In Front Of Me

    The death in front of me manifested in the night
    During my solitary stroll in the gelid streets
    Where no one could have saved me
    Surrounded by the whispers of dead spirit and madness

    The death inside myself amused me without any doubt
    The fantasies and memories that constantly would have hunted me
    They disappeared in the emptiness of the night
    And I alone had to face all my fears and anguishes
    Without any help or comfort

    Conscious of my unfair fate, I had to seek refuge in my inner thoughts
    Where I have could definitely be myself
    With no remorse or regrets
    Aiming to the most pure, and beautiful realm of my dreams

    A realm of visions and dreams was conceived by my weirdness and bizarre imagination
    Uncontrolled emotions pervaded my body until my bones
    And I didn’t feel anymore the frigid wind that stroked me
    I couldn’t even realise in which reality I was living in

    The darkness and the absolute silence were my loyal companions
    Although all the bizarre fantasies in my mind were always making noise
    And all I could see was the death in front of me
    Waiting for me to fall into decay
    I ended up in my dungeon, from where I never could have escaped

    My heart was entirely lost and full of longings
    And I couldn’t find any reasonable wisdom
    So much I was mislaid in my realm of illusions
    That I couldn’t see other realities than mine

    Nevertheless, when I was awakened from my slumber
    I felt the pain of my suffering and the transience of my imagination
    Yearning for a long-lost serenity that I never had
    A utopia made of ethereal beauty and love

    The death in front of me strove to possess me
    But it never had the chance to seize me
    Instead, I slipped through its grasp among the several shadows of the night
    Elisabetta

  • Nonsense In The Evening

    Nonsense In The Evening

    Nonsense in the evening
    Sad and apathetic, I abandoned myself to nonsense
    As I was supposed to be someone with no state of mind
    Indeed, I had no aims or plans

    I felt like a dead leaf falling from a tree
    I felt like a pinwheel that spins empty under the influence of the wind
    Was I supposed to feel something other than discontent?
    It might be as I was listening to the birds singing in the tree

    And so the evening passed like the flowing of a quiet river
    Unperturbed by what was around me
    Because the abyss of anguish was enticing me
    Trapping me in a dungeon of sorrow and dismay
    As I had the certitude that there was no hope for me

    Dreaming and deluding myself has always dragged me into a labyrinth of darkness and decay
    A storm of turmoil invested me
    Leaving me astray
    Faraway from any horizon of sanity

    Emptiness became my realm of fancy
    Although I have always aspired to belong to a different kingdom
    Where the dust of stars would fall over me
    Enlighting me with their comforting and candid glow

    The towering and outstanding sight of my nightmares was hypnotising me
    And I could not avoid to flee from them
    As they cast a wicked spell on me
    To eternally suffer from all the most ominous hoaxes

    Shuttered windows were in front of me
    The windows to my dreams and desires were cruelly sealed
    Nonsense in the evening was my special date
    No stars were present in my nocturnal sky
    No moon was there to wait for me

    All my sparkling wishes faded into the infinite decadence
    Because I belonged only to decadence and I longed to be surrounded by dust of decay
    The decay of my wisdom and certainty was the only certitude I cherished in my treasure chest
    And all that could remain in my heart was nonsense in the evening of my day.
    Elisabetta

  • Fading Into The Darkness

    Fading Into The Darkness

    Fading into the darkness
    Vanishing into the abyss of decay
    I found myself surrounded by my fears and nightmares
    With no hope to stay alive and survive all the anguish

    I become an ethereal creature falling into the garden of lust
    Where I’m intoxicated by the poisonous and vicious scent of flowers
    Flowers of love and flowers of death
    An obsidian alcove where my passions take form in phantom splendour, doomed to languish with the waning moon

    The most unholy visions come to my mind
    And my heart pounds like the frantic wings of a bat lost in a cathedral’s hollow darkness
    Whilst a pounding rain pierces my heart like sharp daggers

    My silent screams rise into the ethereal void
    Leaving me lonely as I gasp on the ground in my dungeon of solitude and sorrow
    Fading into the darkness of my pangs of love
    I vanish in the mysterious world of my nightmares

    I lost my mind, and my soul belongs to every torment of mine
    I saw all the occurrences of my existence floating in my mind
    Like haunting ghosts stalking me in every hidden thought
    I belonged to my dreads rooted inside my heart like sharp thorns

    My luscious passions and longings bend me
    They break my heart, shattering into thousands of fragments
    I remain totally alone, wandering in the darkness that is killing me
    Like a sweet poison tainting my soul softly and slowly

    The tragicity of my fate condemned me to never lie in rest
    The wild storm inside my heart lacerated me
    And I strived to survive and maintain sanity
    But every spec of wisdom had left me permanently

    Doomed to be a peculiar and ethereal creature
    I was resolute to reside in my own realm of phantasmagoria
    And live there for the rest of my miserable reality
    To forsake forever my pristine mind, once chained in obsessive normality, now unshackled in delirium.
    Elisabetta

  • Sweet Decadence

    Sweet Decadence

    Sweet decadence of instants already vanished
    In the void of my loneliness, I found affliction
    And dust of decay fell over me like an incessant rain
    Whilst I wandered alone in the cold nighttime

    Suddenly, I saw my fears, and anguish gripped me
    Making me captive in its dark dungeon
    Where a sweet decadence waited for me to swallow my soul
    And shattering my heart in infinite fragments of love and pain

    Hence, I sighed, waiting for fate to destroy my dreams and expectations
    A moment of death and transformation
    Like a nocturnal moth morphing into an everlasting flame
    Surrounded by the merciless void of indifference and unbending decree

    The magic touch of the stars stroked my hair
    While I got lost in the labyrinth of my dreams
    Dreams that appeared as nightmares
    Undisclosed secrets of all the forbidden lives I lived

    Drowning in the deep and dark ocean
    Where I kept my fragile and stormy mysteries
    Arcane truths hid underneath my soul
    The sources of my fantasmagorical realm of fantasies

    Sweet decadence became my languid alcove
    My secret world to which I always belonged
    And I will always belong
    My treasure chest was full of dust of decay and anguish

    All the fruits of betrayal poisoned my essence
    Tainting my heart with their ink of blood and darkness
    Subtly whispering lovely words of love and exquisite sweetness
    Entangling me with its chains of silk and gold

    In the garden of my forbidden desires and passions
    Enticed by their spells and mesmerised by the lush of their scent
    I fell into a perpetual slumber, and the death of my wisdom and sanity occurred suddenly
    It was a consequence of the venomous thorns of nocturnal roses

    I closed my eyes to look inside my dreams of sweet decadence and decay
    I segregated myself from the world
    I created my own secret world made of magnificence and beauty
    A realm belonging only and only to me
    My kingdom and heavenly refuge of joy.
    Elisabetta

  • I Live Of Instants

    I Live Of Instants

    I live of instants that become memories
    Dying in the dark of the mind
    Whenever I encounter a flower, a tree or a cloud
    Slowly melting under the burden of my passions
    I become another drop of a rainstorm that flows through myself

    Glowing stars are witnesses of the insanity of my own dreams
    Faraway chimaeras of a fate that fell apart
    Like a fractured crystal shattered into an infinity of burning flames
    Softly waiting to fade away and never reappear
    So, I do feel the fragility of my essence in the vast darkness that is striving to swallow me

    I acquiesce in the light of solitude and silence
    The abyss of nothingness striving to swallow me
    In its limitless gorge where no sparkle of hope is allowed to be
    And the ephemeral sense of existence is obliterated
    In the magnificent realm of decay

    I live of instants that become a part of me
    In a nostalgic and sweet decadence dwelling in me
    A suspended flower without roots or ground to rely on
    Lonely in the cold atmosphere of my shell
    Where I will always belong for eternity

    I’ve always lived in a surreal reality
    Neither dead nor alive
    Being in abeyance
    Surrounded by dead stories
    And death and blood

    Life was fading into a chamber full of dust of decay
    Sweet decadence was my exquisite dream and comfort
    In a world where I perpetually faded away into wonders and nightmares
    In the illusion of change eventually, embracing the ordinary and expected
    My heart was pounding because of the absence of a thrill

    Sweet was the slumber that wrapped me
    In a celestial aura of avoidance and devastation
    Where all my senses were betrayed by blades and burns
    Embracing sorrow and misery
    Ignored by most as I was an invisible ghost

    I live of instants and memories hidden by the darkness of my soul
    A kingdom of obscurity and decadence
    Where I’m the only beloved ruler
    Gasping and signing once I’ve lost all my tears in the affliction of the night.
    Elisabetta

  • A Long Night of Desires

    A Long Night of Desires

    A long night of desires and regrets beneath the infinite darkness of the firmament disclosed many dreams and secrets.

    And for each memory, a terrible ghost of the past appeared under the shape of an ominous shadow whose silent scream shattered every flower to dust.

    A fearless storm surrounded the night with its thunders and gloomy clouds, obliterating every trace of beauty from the realm of dreams and darkness.

    Giving way to nothingness and void that swallowed everything with an eerie fury.
    All that remained was a desert with scattered fragments of emotions and love.

    The moonlight lit flames of longing and despair, glinting like shattered glass, trembling with soft murmurs.

    Every blossom of the garden of distress flowered into a withered bloom, and each petal fell like a sour teardrop, dissolving into the sand.

    The inextinguishable emptiness exhaled its yearning across the barren universe, and its absolute silence swelled louder than the storm’s wildest cry.

    Hopes dissolved into the blank abyss like a river of lost dreams flowing to nowhere while love’s faint flames glinted, swallowed by the surreal dimness.

    Into the maze of sorrow, the eternal night became infinite and relentless, with its secrets buried beneath waves of grief.

    Glooms and clouds depleted all the frail remnants of light and joy, replacing them with immense anguish and decay.

    The long night of desires became an endless night of regrets when nightmares swirled around the world like haunting ghouls, tormenting every slumber.

    The infinite abyss of darkness extinguished everything, enclosing every faded memory of a realm once alive and now barely reduced to fragments of despair.

    A wailing blizzard agonised the desert of despair, dragging all the fragments of forgotten dreams and scattering the ashes of love that once burned radiant.

    The stars above, veiled by eternal dismay, became hollow gazes observing the doomed ruins below, becoming witnesses to a tale of a long night of desires devoured by the infinite chasm of oblivion.

    The firmament extended its icy and infinite arms, claiming all and leaving nothing but an absolute silence resounding as a boundless and eternal requiem for dead dreams.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • The Realm of Dust and Decay

    The Realm of Dust and Decay

    The realm of dust and decay was the place where I’d been hiding all my life, hopeless and devoid of love.

    A frozen spiderweb trapped me like a doomed dungeon full of wickedness, oppression and violence.

    Fate hasn’t been fair enough to grant me mirth and tranquillity but instead reserved me a prison of decay and lifeless despair.

    Invisible chains of control and oppression were twisted around my body, making me wish to fall into the abyss of death.

    The nights were too long to keep my sanity alive, long enough to remember that I was alive.

    Every night was too long to endure the chaos inside myself.

    Like a storm, each day was a struggle to keep me alive without any wisdom and future sight.

    Dreaming about oblivion and escape to a realm of dreams and illusions.

    Dreams and fantastic tales were the only evasions from my reality that displayed brutal colours among the tedious rituals of phoney perfection.

    Having lost my essence and my innocence, I became a non-living creature.

    Believing that couldn’t be more different, the reality surrounding me like an ominous dark cloud.

    I fell into the abyss of self-obliteration and resignation, swallowed by an undesirable fate.

    Living a life at the mercy of the winds and storms.

    Feeling a tiny flower floating in the vast ocean of the unknown.

    Mad nightmares were constant visions, like surrealist paintings of despair.

    My secrets became my only identity, kept hidden like a treasure.

    As a living paradox and contradiction, I was just part of the realm of dust and decay.

    And there was no escape from the labyrinth that held me captive, like a bird stripped of its wings.

    And, as if in an absolute dream, I longed only to vanish into the infinite darkness, never to emerge again.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • Drifting Away

    Drifting Away

    drifting away into nothingness
    into the total self-destruction
    not caring about the reality anymore
    letting the oblivion swallow me
    until nothing remains but only my name carved on a cold stone

    drowning deeply into the abyss of death
    where I will not be anything anymore
    not even memories will be left
    just some rhyme in the realm of dreams and decay

    fearless desires could never be lit up like inextinguishable flames
    but only frozen feelings were ruling the realm of my dreams

    the garden of my lust and passions became a desert
    where weeds of indifference grew like majestic trees
    trees of obliviousness and shallowness

    all my devotion and cherished treasures of love were destroyed by the ominous fire of betrayal
    leaving me a crashed flower with no vital signs
    just a dead flower on the cruel soil made of artificial adoration

    It’s just like a broken doll without impulse and lymph
    left alone to starve the love she really needed
    ready to be devoured by the void like she never existed

    drifting away into the valley of death and obliteration
    glad to have disappeared forever
    with regrets and remorses cling to me like Ivy

    a cruel wind spoils my heart, breaking it into pieces
    leaving me senseless, like buried alive in a trap of disloyalty

    surrendering to my defeat, I let death ruin me
    becoming fragments of stars
    fading away from the world of hypocrisy and diseases

    my screams were just too silent to be heard
    my heartbeats stopped permanently
    nothing anymore was the same
    in a garden of decay and cruelty
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • The Abyss of Oppression

    The Abyss of Oppression

    The abyss of oppression was a realm of shadows and fear where hope decayed,
    And a silent grip began its play, winding in a dark embrace,
    And pulling everything into a hollow alcove.

    In haunted kingdoms, gloomy clouds distressed tranquillity,
    The poundage of insanity was so cruel and cold,
    That no hope dared to hold dreams and expectations anymore,
    While sinking in the deep and poisoned blight of fear.

    Starlight grew frail like a fragile gem,
    In an eerie aura that stained the sky dead,
    Beneath, where the sun had lost its way,
    Where longings lay cast but ghostly grey.

    In dismay, sorrow spoke aloud under the oppression’s grasp in endless nights,
    When despair rose to heights unknown,
    And fragile desires trembled in the invisible void,
    The weight of loss bore down, relentless, keen,
    As the oblivion feasted on the faint heart’s prayer.

    In that desolate realm where no light could endure,
    And where silence was torn by unheard wails,
    Weary hearts, caught in iron chains,
    Clung to fragments of memories grown pale.

    The skies collapsed like a suffocating veil,
    Where chimaeras, once shining, dissolved to dust and ash,
    And all that remained was a forlorn lament,
    As the abyss of oppression drew down in a final crash.

    The chasm of illusions swallowed every expectation,
    Leaving but a decayed vestige of misery and distress.
    Every gleam of promise faded into hollow whispers of betrayal,
    While enchanting raindrops soaked every dream in a sorrowful mire.

    In the shadows, spells enticed those solitary dreamers into fractured and senseless ravines of despair,
    Trapping them for eternity.
    Darkness claimed the last faint gleam,
    And despair surged forth like a relentless stream.

    In this realm of night, the shadows reigned supreme,
    Binding dreams in chains, silencing the soul’s scream.
    The abyss of oppression annihilated every mirth and delight, beauty and magnificence,
    Leaving a kingdom of chaos and insignificance.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • The Mansion of Anguish

    The Mansion of Anguish

    The mansion of anguish was filled with flowers of dread,
    Sighs echoed in each empty chamber like merry butterflies,
    The scent of betrayal penetrated every crevice of this eerie dwelling,
    As a consequence of broken vows and promises.

    The name of love has been desecrated, and love itself has been obliterated,
    In an extinguished fire, vestiges of mirth were lying,
    Buried underneath a stack of piles of ashes and blood,
    And the pain was carved on each stone.

    Hushed sobs created a fountain of dismay and grief,
    Where solitary souls had the habit of indulging secretly,
    Waiting for their lovers who were never supposed to come back,
    In a frolic of delusional hallucinations and cruel fate.

    In the middle of the night, farewell left their signs on the decayed walls and shattered mirrors,
    Leaving mere remembrances of broken hearts and aborted dreams,
    Beneath the obsessive moonlight, whose frantic light gleams stroke perpetually the dead flowers in the garden,
    While this realm of decay sparkled magnificently in all its darkness.

    Repetitive laments bloomed like blossoms of death,
    Since the mansion of anguish and sorrow emerged as a monument to decadence,
    And every star hid itself from the insistent stare of the moon’s pale and haunting gaze,
    Shadows of forsaken and lost lovers lingered, whispering fragments of unfulfilled desires and regrets into the hollow aura.

    Each murmur was enthralled by the walls that held infinite teardrops of agony,
    And every silent portrait, dimmed by epochs of neglect, seemed to weep silently in unison with the affliction around them.
    The desolate wind sighed through all the halls, shallowing the ruins of destroyed trinkets that once held sentimental bargains.
    The mansion of anguish became a despondent residence engulfed in an eternal night.
    It stood as a forgotten memorial to love’s betrayal and decay, where beauty had endlessly perished, leaving only a ghostly vestige in its haunted place.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

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