Tag: deliverance

  • The Yellow Rose

    The Yellow Rose

    The yellow rose is my beloved flower
    She watches over me like a star in a dream
    She is always there for me, listening to me
    I love my yellow rose, and she loves me

    In my loneliness, I shun every human shape
    My only refuges are poetry, literature, art and flowers
    I am so overwhelmed by life that I cannot comprehend the sense of my fate
    And so, I abandon myself to decadence and beauty

    Daydreaming is one of my favourite solaces
    I can fly whenever I wish with my imagination
    Avoiding facing a reality and a society I don’t understand
    Feeling always different from others
    I cannot avoid to fall into the valley of despair

    My yellow rose watches over me like a guardian angel
    She is actually my angel, and I protects me from nightmares
    In my secret and hidden garden made of secrets and enigmas
    Where I can lose control of my emotions and be myself

    Panic spasms shake me in my slumber, surrounded by the darkest darkness
    And I can barely breathe, feeling invisible chains around my neck
    And a poundage on my body like an enormous demon of the night
    A ghoul that afflicts my heart with its sharp spear

    The sound of the night birds awakes me in my bed
    And I don’t see anymore my yellow rose that was just an illusion
    A beautiful delusional vision of my subconscious
    I’m all alone again and nothing can protect me anymore

    All my life has been a majestic nightmare
    A nightmare made of violence and survival
    An agony made of horror and demise
    Where there was no place for dreams and hopes

    Being voiceless and invisible has been always my reality
    In an existence where I never wanted to be alive
    Being but a doll, half alive and half dead
    A manipulated and deceived doll

    The yellow was my deliverance and the only companion I had
    But she never existed, for she was the fruit of my illusions
    She was the shining star I had always dreamed of
    And forgetting about this life
    I continue to dream because I’m only made of dreams and stars.
    Elisabetta

  • The Calmness Of Despair

    The Calmness Of Despair

    The calmness of despair filled the firmament
    Having despised vanity as a tempest broke
    The rain was blowing through the windy clouds
    I was not always used to loving dreams
    Once known as happiness lapses
    I went nowhere for one day
    Getting lost in my dreams
    Oftentimes falling into a snare of deceit
    Empty memories full of tears
    An irreverent game of illusions mangled to pieces trust
    Sadness stood at the doorway of the street
    Among the lies of people staring at it

    The calmness of despair was an intense sorrow between life and death
    The fear of terror and pain was caught in a mirror
    When the darkness obscured the emptiness
    A silent ecstasy appeared in my dreams
    A light gleam blew upon me like a hectic wind
    The storm seemed like a gentle breeze that fades
    Grief and pain desired to endure the cold deathless strife
    The fury and the howling of the sky dismantled every speck of serenity
    Indelebile and invisible amnesia of future mistakes
    A silent mystery of undisclosed obsessions hovered
    The dizziness of uncontrollable desires fell like frozen raindrops
    An obscure fate attempted to escape from fear

    In the calmness of despair’s gloom
    No thought would have been flung loose
    As every idealisation became a crystal inside my heart
    And it was impossible to hope and catch a glimpse behind the lids of unconsciousness
    None of my perceptions could lead me to deliverance
    Being constrained by misunderstanding and obstacles
    I had become a mere shadow of my imagination
    A creature of darkness and invisibility without mirrors
    An infinite dreamscape was soon forgotten in the opalescent darkness
    Every time the night shadows fell down in the desert sky
    Lost in my dreams to be never found
    Whispers and illusions met in a terrible embrace

    The calmness of despair in the abyss
    New emotions and thoughts had died too fast
    As long as time was past
    No oracle was allowed to guess
    I looked at the future all alone
    Before having discovered a labyrinth where I lost myself
    And where the pain had healed my wounds
    Completely awoken and sunken into a desire for absence
    The stillness of anguishes is a melody concealed in the ocean
    My dreams were composed of delights and pangs
    And everything was captivated by beauty and insanity
    Whenever a silent cry faded far away beyond all earthly things.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

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