Esther Racah Writer & Literary Blogger

Tag: distress

  • The Portal To Emptiness

    The Portal To Emptiness

    The portal to emptiness was waiting for me
    In hesitation and doubt, I didn’t feel any comfort
    I didn’t trust what I was seeing or hearing
    All I could be assured of was a feeling of uncertainty

    It was as if I was living one of my several lives
    Foolishly embracing my madness with such joy
    Even the wind was terrified by me in its impetuosity
    Being myself, a little tornado of intense emotions

    Left by myself in my extreme solitude
    I sought refuge from my overwhelming grief
    Grief towering over me like a monumental demon
    Making me an insolent creature of the night

    Chasing darkness, I have finally found myself deep
    On the ocean floor of my imagination
    In my realm of wonders and chimeras
    I desired to find my utopic idyll

    My dreams touched me night and day
    All over my body like soft strokes
    Fantasies pierced my heart making it bleed
    With their sweet and sharp daggers

    I became a crimson rose, with all my petals tainted by blood
    And pointed thorns as powerful as diamond gems
    Although I was crying for my freedom from my roots and cold soil
    I had to surrender to my slavery

    And I could only dream over and over again without hope
    I cried and sobbed like a winter storm
    And I felt needles stabbing all my petals
    Arrows of anguish and awareness of my impending decay

    Nothing anymore could have released me from my huge distress and dismay
    I was merely a red rose and nothing more
    One of the several red roses of an ordinary city garden
    Nothing anymore could have been important to me

    The portal to emptiness was in front of me
    And now, I was made of dust and decay
    Decadence was my name and like a butterfly pinned on a wall
    I remained still as a crystal rose standing on a barren earth.
    Elisabetta

  • Lonely Silence

    Lonely Silence

    Lonely silence in an empty space where there was no place for dreams and illusions. Tears were not allowed anymore since the night when delusions ruled the realm of emotions.

    Nothing could have been better than losing hope because it would have avoided the waves of anguish of destroying the beloved castle of expectations.

    Waiting was an endless torture, silent but perpetually tormenting the process of self-adulation. Lonely silence remained the only faithful refuge and loyal companion for the rest of an arid existence.

    Suddenly, the night conspired with the ruler of nightmares to ensure that distress and emptiness were constantly present even during the desired slumber.

    The bells of scorn welcomed the new dreamers, wanderers of the fantastic garden of dreams and illusions. No one could guess what was expected behind the veil of oblivion but only an abyss of darkness.

    Solitude and silence reigned supreme, surrounding the eternal infinity. A lonely silence was all that remained after the storm of sorrow, and fear annihilated everything.

    A poisonous slumber entranced the unaware spirits and vagabonds without any dwelling.
    The sound of struggles echoed faintly, swallowed by the void, leaving no trace of their existence.

    The night sky was heavy with forgotten stars, and even the winds surrendered to despair. The moon, veiled in shadows, refused to shine upon the desolate lands, where time itself seemed to falter, hindered by the weight of sorrow.

    In this forsaken realm, no light dared to shine, and no heart dared to dream again. Each instant only led deeper into the abyss, where memories twisted into haunting phantoms, mocking the once cherished dreams.

    The arcane fate was invisible, and the lure of despair was undeniable, enticing all who wandered into its unforgiving embrace. And a lonely silence was the only entity that survived as an inextinguishable flame of anguish.

    A flame of sorrow and despair that gleamed weakly and persistently, casting faint shadows on the remnants of shattered hopes. It burned not to illuminate but to consume every last vestige of longing.

    The world, now a graveyard of forsaken ideals, bowed to its eternal anathema. Nothing stirred, save for the ceaseless murmur of time slipping away, unnoticed, uncared for.

    Within this boundless void, the lonely silence persisted, its flame feeding on the very essence of sorrow, an immortal witness to the final extinction of hope.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • Twisted Obsessions

    Twisted Obsessions

    Twisted obsessions of failed dreams,
    In the darkened corners of the subconscious,
    Where shadows unleashed dreams unwound,
    A world of obsessions, all alone.

    Whispers echoed through the sordid obscurity,
    Drawing wraiths to forbidden lights,
    A touch, a sigh, a fleeting glance,
    Lost in the thrall of a reckless trance.

    Desires stolen and broken, out of reach,
    Longings hidden, cruel and true,
    Yearning for those invisible chimaeras the day denied,
    In silent, shamed, and sleazy cries.

    Souls that sought what they should shun,
    Minds that ached for the undone,
    In a labyrinth of illusions and betrayal,
    Obsessions took their hidden refuge.

    A tangled web of despair and loss,
    A dungeon where dark passions bred,
    Haunted in a ghostly daze,
    Lost forever in a damning swirl.

    A gloom and spark remained amidst the chains of dissolution,
    On the deepest night, twisted obsessions ensnared all the dreamers,
    In an abyss of despair and fear with no turning points,
    Even if hope was not a lost cause.

    Twisted obsessions of gloomy fates were the cruel rulers of chaotic existences,
    Once again, they were reborn each nighttime,
    Under the influence of an uncertain order of arcane forces.

    Numbness and slumber remained faithful companions of painful reveries,
    Whenever the desire for despair and sorrow trapped every delight,
    In the midst of the chaos and unknown,
    A game of subjugation and delirium.

    Twisted obsessions and sad insanities,
    Danced on the edges of broken hearts,
    Feeding on the remnants of the soundness of mind,
    Spinning tales of endless binds.

    Sighs of broken promises were released,
    Only to fall into the most profound distress of the night,
    Where shadows became the only lonely and friendly essences,
    And the sun’s happiness was out of sight.

    In such a realm, where reality was fractured,
    Dreams and fears became a forest of drear,
    A fictitious masquerade of hopes defiled,
    By the weight of twisted time.

    Indeed, in the heart of this desolation,
    Every gleam of delight faded away,
    Souls were swallowed by the dark embrace,
    And lost dreams continued to fray.

    Twisted obsessions, relentless and cold,
    Fractured every delight into a shattered mould,
    Leaving behind a void where hope had once dwelled.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • Torments Of Existence

    Torments Of Existence

    Torments of existence and death,
    Until the last speck of hope had been granted,
    To dreamers and illusioned vainly expecting realms of dreams,
    Underneath a starless night sky occluded by ignominious clouds.

    Despair hid behind shadows of forsaken longings,
    As the cold wind of fate chilled the bones of lonely ghouls,
    In the heart of the infinite darkness, where light dared not tread,
    And only silent screams of forgotten souls would reverberate unheeded.

    The essence of broken promises and shattered aspirations dissipated into the abyss,
    Unseen and unheard with a load of sorrow heavy as lead,
    In the midst of a reality binding and drenching them in perpetual twilight.

    No trace of lost dreams could have been revealed in the dark labyrinth of hunted spirits, Whose only solace lay in the embrace of eternal nights,
    For in this realm, the fragments of dreams merged with the wails of misery,
    Lost into the void.

    Torments of existence within a mournful maze of endless gloom,
    Within the depths of such despair,
    A gleam of defiance struggled to ignite,
    Amid the shadows of a dead heart.

    Every sliver of light strove to pierce through the suffocating dark,
    Until it became a frail memory of sick diseases,
    A weak flame that could not have endured the majestic abyss of emptiness,
    Swallowing every time and space.

    Death and destruction annihilated every hope and dream,
    Leaving only an empty desolation of shattered illusions and lost chimaeras,
    A barren expanse where the echoes of forgotten hopes lingered faintly,
    Relegated to the recesses of nightmares afflicted by the relentless tide of despair.

    In this forsaken domain, murmurs of bygone fantasies and dreams soared unrestrained,
    Hereafter reduced to haunting and obscene obsessions,
    The relentless march of time brought no solace,
    Only a deeper descent into the chasm of hopelessness.

    Anguished cries resonated eternally in an endless symphony of sorrow,
    And amidst the ruins of a world forsaken by light,
    Lonely figures wandered aimlessly, lost in the maze of torment and desolation,
    Spectres of once hopeful dreamers.

    In this realm where the sun dared not shine,
    And the moon’s glow was but a distant memory,
    Hope had become a relic of the past,
    A forgotten treasure buried beneath the weight of endless distress,
    In the presence of such overwhelming darkness.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • The Agony Of Uncertainty

    The Agony Of Uncertainty

    The agony of uncertainty is my dwelling
    It was all I had written on a mirror
    A long sequence of characters
    Which I used to write
    And nothing further
    Forever and never
    I have been lost
    Striving to remember my name and my story
    Since I was born with a great devotion to art
    Such joy should be life
    Once everything has been forgotten with time

    The agony of uncertainty is a tree in the sea
    Where it is possible to be merry
    A moment has come to bear a perceived memory
    Like dreams repeatedly created and destroyed
    Each season and new year
    The time is past and never hides
    Torments are shortened by days and nights
    To avoid suffering and distress
    I might become pleased as I would pretend
    My past life never existed
    Becoming something imaginary

    The agony of uncertainty is a dark forest
    Where the wounds never disappear
    Only memories can unfold
    Looking onward and writing my dreams
    And all those unconcealed secrets
    That the soul keeps as the deepest memories
    The nightmares of the heart are lost in the dark
    The fate of dark stars is entwined in indifference
    The gloom of endless thoughts of sorrow
    Lost forever in a silent emptiness
    Which never dies

    The agony of uncertainty and pain
    Thereupon I move forward through the long desert of death
    Reaching more intention and joy
    My thoughts are made of fears
    Bleeding each time, I became wiser
    No hope was found in the devotion of love
    Instants of lust in the deepest silence
    Fretting about the decay of every bliss
    Dread should last forever in death
    When everything is lost
    The truth is the door of a new consciousness

    The agony of uncertainty and delight
    Always shining in an infinite reality
    My heart is truly sacred
    Beyond deception and mendacity
    Seeking the truth as an insight
    When no choice is granted
    The tears, like fright, lit the earth
    The grief within my soul is still alive
    I should not always be afraid
    Gifted with patience to keep
    My soul is bound to be naive.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • Paranormal Life

    Paranormal Life

    Paranormal life is taking place
    Missives from past and future
    A story behind good or evil
    However fair could be this time
    I do always move forward with a chance
    Irrevocable thoughtless by day
    I become made of things out of fantasy
    For years in future, I would not be found
    No matter how is senseless evermore to like what we believe
    I would be better going together in love and hate

    Paranormal life
    Where I have no place
    And the destruction of truth overcomes
    Since I was alone for so long
    And I couldn’t raise my notes
    So I lie down in time inside a real world I’ve made up
    Taking my time through a tough life
    My mind remains still in a moment
    which makes me feel sad
    My thoughts are gone

    Paranormal life
    A life where I can be lost in a world with no roads
    Day after day until tomorrow when the years will disappear
    I am safe as a mystery
    As the truth exists
    It will lead to the future
    Whilst I give up on what it’s happening,
    The reality is based on a need for an eternal journey
    My soul had overcome the darkness
    Releasing freedom from each desire

    Paranormal life
    Every inch of my soul remains unknown
    When I become honest with myself
    Obliterating every trust in love
    And from now, I am lost forever in my new dreams
    Until a new dawn begin for my novel life
    Coming back to an eternity of senses
    In a long life with no shared hope
    For each forgotten moment
    All the last words are gone to the end of time

    Paranormal life was a dream of a tragedy
    Where every fleeting fantasy has a hope to exist
    But no soul remains untamed and intact
    I left myself with a glimpse of imagination
    The beauty of my passions and illusions
    An eternal dream which is divine and belongs only to me
    With time, everything is found in my mind
    Being in a state of my own with no distress or anguish
    Vanity and mysticism exhausted me
    Living becomes no real, and the expectations sink into the dim ocean of nightmares.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • The Echo Of A Broken Dream

    The Echo Of A Broken Dream

    The echo of a broken dream
    Is the sky’s vast light
    Which is rising in winter’s rain
    From the flight of little birds
    A song to drink and dance
    It can be heard faraway
    Thinking about time and failure
    So short life to regret
    Unending and unlimited endeavours for life’s delight
    When dreams come
    What might be lost could be found
    But long is the path of mistakes and struggles
    Never well-known enough to prevent distress and anguish
    In sleepless nights something and nothing has been revealed
    It always began the creation
    Destroying and creating
    By chance and love
    Like no more devotion would be granted like before
    Each thought of desire would be loyal and engraved
    Reading the infinite source of darkness
    And still enjoying every strive and pang
    In the hope of living inside an untamed soul
    Never like before
    It would become a gloomy and arduous heart

    The echo of a broken dream
    The sea of darkness is blasting
    Now that the night has come
    Harkening to the wind
    Whenever the wildness of the sea is fearless and indomitable
    The fallen souls have drifted into a slumber time
    Sighing along the cliff of the abyss
    Never seen to this day what it might not be quested
    A beautiful forsaken tale would be a lavish obscure dream
    A wonder and a marvel
    Sunken down into a remote universe
    Since the eternity
    It has always been there for me
    And always will be
    With no guesses or questions about life
    I fell down into the chasm of the time
    When it is believed to cast away the darkness and shadows
    With the loss of eternity
    Whilst everything was bound together inside a hidden and blissful oasis
    Every kind of dream was being offered like some joyful lie
    Sweet like poison and bitter like truth
    Like those revelations that will never be disclosed
    And desires would be offered as secret snares

    The echo of a broken dream
    Which lived forever in the abysm of the sea
    And was made of divine light
    New eternal dimensions are recreated
    The vision of a single and lonely night
    The world would start all over again and again
    Until all the clouds of darkness would end
    And the wonders of harmony and hymns would be created
    The world’s clout will last forever
    Truly and devotedly
    Days depart and perish
    Every longing will convey a new route of deception and authenticity
    Change delivers wisdom in the everlastingness
    When only one new lifetime is allowed to become true
    Love is death, love is untamed, love is betrayal, and love is life
    Being trapped in a new belief
    Acting to set free every uncoveted desire inside the soul
    And wishing to find a place in the universe
    If everything could materialise in an abode with faithful devotion
    There would be only bliss and an ever-lasting delight in life
    Certitude and suspicion could obliterate each other
    Probity and passion would be devoted eternally

    The echo of a broken dream
    Stalled so perfectly in my mind and once more disappeared
    As forgotten for ages
    Such a feeling of authentic dismay
    I disclosed the evening
    Lingering for darkness and nightmares
    A soft touch of sharp thorns
    Although pain and tears could flood my heart
    So many times
    I have been destined
    And magnificence would be a journey of delight and bliss
    Nothing else
    After my soul wandered lost in torment and misery
    With no more passion
    Dreaming that in a swoon
    My heart would always glow
    Not at all because of pleasure
    But striving to return to its primordial harmony.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • The Screech Of Indifference

    The Screech Of Indifference

    The Screech Of Indifference

    The screech of indifference
    The invisible shape of disillusions
    When the caducity of time and entities
    Fall into a throb of hope
    Whilst incorporeal feelings
    Are bent by gusts of distress.

    A deprivation of emotions alters
    Transforming into a blaze of greed and obsession
    The death of illusions breaks the artifice of existence
    Similar to a dream melting into a vortex of torments.

    Decay and ineptitude overcome
    Once the tremor of mediocrity
    Obliterate every sparkle of sublimity
    And silent wretchedness tarnishes every edge
    In the infinite ocean of longings.

    The screech of indifference
    In a state of desertion of the souls
    Longings of burning deceptions
    A surreal and imaginary mystery
    Surrounded by hideous monstrosities.

    Limping shards of a lost whisper
    Disguise in the shadow of an instant
    A gathering of wonders and desires seizes endless anguishes
    When reminiscences dissolve in the ethereal.

    The intangible world of the ideas
    Collapses in the dreary chasm of the metaphysical
    The hesitation of a glimpse of a dream
    Disappears in a hidden spoil of eternal emptiness.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah