Esther Racah Writer & Literary Blogger

Tag: emotional

  • Awaken By Nightmares

    Awaken By Nightmares

    Awaken by nightmares at nightfall
    I surrender to the sense of my fragility and languor
    Condemned to wander perpetually in the forest of darkness
    With no clear direction to follow

    Stroked by the gelid indifference of humankind
    I am lured to the realm of my dreams and delusions
    To avoid facing reality and shun all conformism that brings me down
    Choosing to stop hiding my emotions and let them flow like a winter rainfall

    I decided to live on chimaeras and desires
    Being determined that there is no impossibility
    But everything is possible and feasible
    As long as I belong to the world of dreams

    Awaken by nightmares amid the night
    My will leaves me and I become a paradox and absurdity
    Because madness and folly strive to entangle me in their labyrinth with no escapes
    Where I am bound to the whims of my fancies

    I dissolve into the ethereal and I see that all my visions and dreams are real
    And now the world where I live is magnificent and exquisite
    I don’t feel pain, nor anguish, nor fear
    Everything is beautiful and nonsense as it must be

    When we greet and wish each other Good Morning or Good Evening
    What do we really wish for?
    Do we mean to continue our day as regular and similar to the previous one?
    Or do we aim for something more spectacular and extravagant?

    Most of the people live like monads
    Always connected but disconnected and indifferent
    Always connected but lonely and sad
    They say, “Dress to impress,” but I would rather confirm that people wear masks just to avoid being themselves and exposing their flaws

    Do we keep ourselves alive just to survive or to live?
    I never understood the humankind mindset
    It could be I’m not from this world but from another realm
    Impressive would be to see humans show and manifest their real emotions and impulses
    After all, we should all be awakened by nightmares to live our dreams.
    Elisabetta

  • Victimised By My Desires

    Victimised By My Desires

    Victimised by my desires and love
    I try to detach from my heart’s impulses
    But it is useless because I am chained completely
    Like a prey of my own longings, craving for my soul

    I keep believing in my dreams and impossible chimeras
    Never breaking the chain of my own distress
    Trusting love and its cruel games
    A realm of beauty and deception

    Victimised by my desires and obsessions
    I get lost in my dreams where I feel safe and protected
    And I sing my song of love and self-destruction
    As a way to cast a spell over myself over and over again

    Alive and dead
    Happy and sad
    I fade away into the darkness of my life
    Becoming a victim of my emotions and weakness

    Every time that my dreams whisper lies to me
    I feel euphoric and powerful as I’m destined to a perpetual merriment
    Instead, I fall into the profound abyss of misery
    Where I compassionately cry crystal teardrops

    I never stop sighing in this valley of desolation
    As I’m permanently condemned to wander endlessly with no destination
    As I’m permanently condemned to never find peace in my innermost spirit

    Seized by cobwebs of love and impossibilities
    Abducted into secret alcoves of empty vows
    I surmise that my own delusions are real, mistaking them for truths
    And see only exquisite beauty in this world because I want to believe so

    In my dark chamber, I cry and sigh
    In my secret niche, I embrace oblivion
    Aware that nobody, absolutely nobody, thinks about me
    In this senseless existence, deprived of empathy

    Forlorn and disenchanted, I wait for the true love
    Although I’m sure I can feel it, and I can see it as a beautiful vision
    As I’m very foolish and ingenue, losing easily control of my feelings
    And I’m glad to fall into the trap of my longings
    And I’m delighted that I’m victimised by my desires.
    Elisabetta

  • Echoes of Solitude

    Echoes of Solitude

    The echoes of solitude lingered like ghosts,
    Each sigh was a reminder of what was permanently lost.
    In the chambers of silence, where memories faded,
    I traced the soft outlines of illusions that betrayed.

    Once passionate and secure, my heart knew no bounds,
    However, in the quiet, the many storms overwhelmed around.
    The walls whispered secrets of sorrow and pain,
    Recounting the moments where hope met disdain.

    Each creak of the floorboard evoked a haunting voice from the past,
    Telling of fables and merriments that couldn’t last.
    The portraits that hung on the walls seemed to cry,
    Reflecting my longing, my wish to defy.

    In the heart of the stillness, where time lost its touch,
    I wandered through memories; my heart could not heal from the clutch.
    The enigmas became entangled, too complex to feel,
    A web of lost moments, no truth to reveal.

    I spoke to the shadows, confided my fears,
    Revealing the heartache that flowed like my tears.
    Indeed, in this embrace of the silent abyss,
    I found a strange comfort, a longing for bliss.

    For solitude wrapped me in a stone mansion,
    Where the flowers of anguish began to flourish without caution.
    In the stillness, I pondered the paths that I chose,
    And the weight of my sorrow, a delicate prose.

    Each echo was a lesson, each silence a melody,
    In the chasms of my solitude, I found serenity.
    Though the world outside faded into the mist,
    In the meadows of solitude, I found my true bliss.

    But even in happiness, a cloud remained,
    A reminder of all that could never be tamed.
    For solitude’s comfort is an ephemeral glimpse at best,
    A fleeting illusion that cannot bring rest.

    And so I remain, a soul intertwined,
    Among echoes of solitude, lost to the mind.
    Surrounded by the quietude, I drift like the night,
    Searching for peace, yet bound to the light.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • The Embrace of the Void

    The Embrace of the Void

    In the embrace of the void, where shadows entwine,
    I surrendered my heart to the arcane silence.
    Here, in the stillness, all sounds had ceased,
    I found my own peace, but my spirit was leased.

    The night wrapped around me like a lover’s caress,
    With each sigh, I let slip a whisper of grief.
    I wandered through landscapes where no light could intrude,
    Lost in the abyss of a sorrowful realm.

    The stars above flickered like memories gone,
    Their light was just a glimmer, a glimpse of the dawn.
    In the embrace of the void, time slipped away,
    A moment eternal, where shadows held sway.

    I felt the cold raindrops of darkness draw near,
    A shroud woven tightly, instilling pure fear.
    Yet strangely, within this chasm, I discovered a treasure,
    A comfort in stillness, a profound solace.

    For what is the void but a mirror of myself,
    Reflecting the depths of my own anguish?
    I wandered unanchored, yet strangely at home,
    In the embrace of the emptiness, forever to linger.

    The silence, a canvas where thoughts drift and sway,
    In colours of longing, that time can’t allay.
    Each heartbeat was a reminder of love left behind,
    In the void’s deep embrace, my heart was unconfined.

    And so I perpetually abide in this realm of despair,
    Where shadows stroke me, and darkness stands revealed.
    Since, only in the embrace of the void, I am free,
    Forever entwined in this haunting decree.

    In the oblivion, I confront the phantoms that dwell in my mind,
    A haunting chorus of echoes, relentless and cruel.
    In dreams and nightmares, I’m lured into this desolate place,
    Hence, I embrace the infinite darkness, each shadow, each sorrow, each trace.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • Rain of Darkness

    Rain of Darkness

    Rain of darkness fell that night, black and thick as tar. It coated the windows, sliding down in slow, oily rivulets, obscuring the world beyond. The streets outside were nothing but shadows, swallowed by the heavy downpour that drowned out all other sounds. The wind howled like a beast in the distance, but its cries were muted, overwhelmed by the suffocating storm.

    Rain of darkness soaked the earth, turning it into a quagmire of mud and decay. Trees bent and creaked under their weight, their branches snapping like brittle bones. The sky above was an endless void, with no stars and no moon to guide the way. Only the relentless black rain, falling in heavy sheets, smothered all in its path. The scent of enigma and decay was melting in the damp evening air, weaving through the tangled shadows of an ancient forest like something dead and forgotten for a long time.

    Rain of darkness filled every inch of solid ground, choking trees and meadows with its oppressive presence as it ran through the forest. Each instant sank into the soggy ground, pulling dreams deeper into the mire. It suffocated the light, leaving only the faintest glimmer of hope trapped beneath the weight of despair. The path ahead was obscured, swallowed by the inky blackness of the storm. Nothing could be heard behind; the rain muffled every mortal trace, and it was still there, still relentless.

    A rain of darkness haunted the woods like a furious ghoul as the night stretched on. There was no shelter there, no safety in the depths of the woods. The storm would never cease, and it became perpetually a predator that would never stop. The rain would fall forever, drowning out the world until there was nothing left but shadows and darkness. And then, even the shadows would fade in the emptiness.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • Dead Desires

    Dead Desires

    Dead desires lingered like ghosts,
    Hovering over ruins of faded aspirations,
    The giggles of delight that once filled the air turned to despair,
    A reminder of desires that withered away,
    Like autumn leaves crumbling into dust,
    Beneath the weight of relentless time.

    In the stillness of forsaken dreams,
    Shadows swirled under the tree of hopes that once thrived,
    Weaving through remnants of a forgotten past,
    Each piece of yearning faded into the void,
    As the heart’s vibrant ache succumbed to silence,
    Lost in the echoes of what could have been.

    Days, once painted in vivid hues,
    Became shrouded in muted greys,
    Each moment became a cruel reminder,
    Of warmth that slipped through fingers,
    The chill of time’s cruel embrace
    Froze every hope into lifelessness.

    A single tear traced a path down a cheek,
    Carrying the burden of unfulfilled wishes,
    The heart, once a vessel of fervour,
    Now beat with a hollow rhythm,
    A metronome marking unachieved desires,
    Each tick resonated with loss.

    Dead desires drifted like fallen leaves,
    Words unspoken, deeply felt,
    In the stillness, they hung heavy,
    As the moon illuminated the decay of hope,
    Scattering dreams like ashes in the wind,
    Leaving only shadows of what had been.

    As twilight approached, the air grew colder,
    Each breath was a reminder of dreams abandoned,
    The heart ached for the fire it once held,
    Now, only embers remained,
    Smouldering in the corners of a darkened soul,
    A monument to the dead desires that lingered on.

    In the quiet corners of memory,
    The shadows whispered tales of longing,
    The paths not taken became a haunting refrain,
    As the heart learned to dwell in the silence,
    Embracing the sorrow that filled the void,
    Finding beauty in the ashes of dreams.

    Dead desires echoed through the aisles of time,
    A haunting melody of what might have been,
    Reverberating through the deepest depths of the abyss,
    And, in their sight, the heart understood,
    That within each ember lay a spark of hope,
    A reminder that even in loss, tragedy can unveil meaning.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • Where The Mind Is Without Fear

    Where The Mind Is Without Fear

    Where The Mind Is Without Fear

    Fleeting mind, where are you flying? To the hills of restlessness, or to the dales of calm? To the depths of the oceans hitherto unexplored? Calm thyself, my greatest friend, or may I call you my most formidable foe, in times of unbridled emotional cataclysm?

    A focused mind is a calm mind, a mind which generates great power, enough to set the turbines of the hydroelectric plants into motion, a mind which brings forth the innumerable discoveries which bless mankind.
    Calm thee my friend, like a Zen master, a single ripple sending forth bursts of a sudden thought, to be eclipsed to oblivion by the calm mind.
    Restless mind, focus on your breath, the deep inspiration and expiration, till you become one with the breath; the state of mind called ‘Satori’, where time and tide stand still; the hours pass by into the fathomless deep void.
    The mind, the great tool possessed by humanity, you are not meant to be wasted on the millions of unwanted thoughts that wade through you, the quality of which, either makes life a beautiful paradise, or the abominable Hades akin to Dante’s Hell. Why my friend, my great mind do you send people into the depths of despair, the uncontrolled negative repetitive thoughts creating hitherto unheard of terms like ‘Depression’, ‘Anxiety’, and ‘Suicide’? Restless mind, when you accept things for what they are, instead of trying to change the world to suit your liking, would you not embrace peace?
    Mind like a volcano, why do you not accept the uniqueness of every human being, how would the world look like, if clad in similar colours, with nothing to break the drab monotony. Mind like water, you go with the flow, creating paths where none exist, filling the vacuum which exists, accepting the beauty of every present moment, the beauty in unevenness, and the unevenness in every beautiful form. My mind, when you see reality for what it is, rather than project your hopes and aspirations into the present, do you not distort the nature of reality and the nature of your progress? Mind, when you calm yourself, all thoughts fade away; you bear no angst towards anyone, and neither do the worries of the past nor the fears of the future torment you. You release everything, till there is nothing left to be released; you and the body you occupy then become one. This state of mind achieved by years of meditative practice is what they refer to as enlightenment, where you do not seek approval from others, and do not have to prove anything to anyone; a state where everything becomes effortless, there is no more struggle or strain, just the calm realisation of ones’ self.
    A mind truly without fear, is a mind without expectation or ego, where you cherish every moment for what it is, enjoy every activity for what it is, immerse yourself fully in the task at the moment-what the modern-day Psychologists call the ‘Zone’, … where hours seem like minutes, and time just fades away without much ado… and you remain in the ‘Divine Now.’