Tag: emotions

  • Perpetually Lost

    Perpetually Lost

    Perpetually Lost

    Perpetually lost in the neverness of hopes
    It cannot be back what is forever lost
    They cannot be back those who nevermore will find a real dimension
    Once they are in another realm
    The lugubrious grief is not an amiable counterpart at most
    Being a shadow of every memory and prospect
    An encomiastical tale of a glorious bliss
    Eternally lost in a furtive instant
    A surreal and silent melody
    Stolen by the wind of the emotions
    Far-fetched beliefs of an idyll
    The need to trust a tainted truth fell into the abyss of misery
    And comfort can only be achieved in constant oblivion.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • Silence Says A Lot

    Silence Says A Lot

    Silence Says A Lot

    silence says a lot
    I saw what I was not supposed to see
    I heard what I was not supposed to hear
    and finally, I understood what I was not supposed to understand
    in the deception, my soul was going blind
    in the truth, I saw the misery
    is it so real a dream which is lasting all life long?
    or instead, is it factual, the empirical reality that lasts few instants?
    does time determine what is deceiving my heart?
    emotions melt away, misleading my sight.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • A Lonely Star In The Universe

    A Lonely Star In The Universe

    A Lonely Star In The Universe

    In the light blue sky, the clouds move fast as the wind passes through them
    In the same way, I feel emotions wander rapidly in my mind
    And they move incessantly and frantically like chaotic clouds
    My mind is a light blue sky, which sometimes becomes dark
    Occasionally numbness and stillness can block my emotions
    I feel my invisibility increasing with time
    It’s like I disappear in the emptiness of the insignificance and blankness
    I struggle to bright like a lonely star in the universe.
    Esther Racah

  • A Burnt Life

    A Burnt Life

    A Burnt Life

    A burnt life has left me behind
    Shallow emotions would be forgotten
    Grief would leave a mark in my heart
    Because of all the traumas I had to bear all life
    It is suggested to be insensitive in this existence
    Because they would not understand all the damages left in my mind and heart
    They would see me just as a body without a soul
    I was just a high-grade intelligent entity with a bunch of degrees
    All the suffering and agonies were buried in the deepest place of my soul
    I was too sensitive, too unusual, too brilliant
    Hence I had to do much more than others
    I always had to be the perfect role model
    Nevertheless, I was all alone in my anguishes
    There was no empathy
    There was no connection
    And it was as if the sky had suddenly fallen on me, and the stars were burning out
    In the secrecy of the dark despair, I was left alone, and pains were stabbing my heart like tiny sharp daggers
    I always had as loyal companions my books
    Being lonely, it was the only refuge where I would spend hours
    Archaeology, Physics, Biology, Literature and Philosophy were my favourite topics
    And I would enjoy reading in English, Italian and French
    A burnt life without escapes entrapped me for a long time
    Leaving me with scars and awful remembrances.

    Esther Racah

  • My Innermost Thoughts

    My Innermost Thoughts

    My Innermost Thoughts

    Sometimes I remember much more that I would need
    Sometimes I would prefer not to write at all
    In this way, I don’t reveal anything about myself
    Each time I express my emotions with my penned words
    It is like I expose myself showing my innermost thoughts
    Taking off all those numerous protective garments enwrapping me

    I was born to bear grief and anguishes silently
    Pretending that nothing happened
    Pretending that everything would be the outcome of my imagination
    Life is a delightful mystery and gift
    It would be easier to obscure the reality with the darkness of my dreams
    Since only in the gloomy dreams I can find my peaceful haven.
    Esther Racah

  • In The Chasm Of Anguishes

    In The Chasm Of Anguishes

    In The Chasm Of Anguishes

    In the chasm of anguishes
    My soul wanders in a desolate immensity
    Faraway, I can hear the echo of a storm
    A violent tempest obscures all the realm
    In silence, I wait immobile
    My memories seize me and entrap me
    Now anguishes and grief welcome me
    And I lose control of my discernment
    Never I will reacquire my old self again
    I became a new person
    Although I am a turmoil of emotions
    Being a soul wandering in a noplace
    I consider each moment of life as a small step
    A minor step to advance in the knowledge of the material world
    I have to abandon my utopistic world made of absurd dreams
    I feel the fears like a frozen wall made of steel
    In the torpour, I try to find a reasonable sense of this life
    All those pains and anguishes build a chasm
    A chasm swallowing every hope and ambition of mine
    The coldness and the darkness of this material reality are overwhelming
    Now I only feel disquiet, and I will never feel safe.
    Esther Racah

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