Esther Racah Writer & Literary Blogger

Tag: loss

  • A Pang In My Heart

    A Pang In My Heart

    A pang in my heart is stabbing me like a dagger
    A wild storm initiated an endless turmoil
    Like a ritual of initiation that crumples my soul
    And the obsessive feelings of burning love

    Astonished to have lost the ability to control my senses
    Like a nocturnal butterfly doomed to be burnt to flame
    When she is attracted by the betrayal of an innocent flame
    Lost in the darkness of the night

    My will is enslaved to the lust of my senses
    A treacherous journey in the midst of a tempest
    Bewildered and bewitched by a wonderful stranger
    Only destiny knows what will occur in the ethereal world of my dreams

    A mesmerising enchantment captivates me to never let me free
    Wandering in total obscurity with no direction
    Feeling a fever of anguishes and hopes
    While an incessant rain is falling over me

    Unlock doors let me think about you
    As I would love to be there at that precise moment close to you
    Even in silence while I cannot stop crying
    Because I would love us to be immortal lovers

    Time passes but not my love for you
    Whose name is still unknown in my heart
    I wish you could have been reading these verses
    But I have the certitude that you will never read them

    Sobbing and sighing I open the window of chaos
    Embracing my inner tumult and apathetically breathing as I write
    Is there a chance of meeting someone by destiny?
    I always wonder about the reasons, but never about the surprises of life

    I lost hope and I dismissed myself to let stupor dismay me
    While I cannot stop thinking about you
    While I cannot stop loving you
    Even if I’m just an anonymous neighbour of yours

    I only treasure the spare and casual moments I had encountered you
    In real life and in my dreams
    And never forget about you
    While a pang in my heart stabs me deeply.
    Elisabetta

  • I Lived In Death

    I Lived In Death

    I lived in death, and the death lived in me
    As long as memories were within me
    As long as I relied on my dungeon of darkness and dismay
    The daggers of betrayal stabbed my heart and soul
    Numbing my mind in an eternal slumber for a decade of decay

    Foolishness was my wisdom and guide
    For I forgot my name at a time without the time
    In the eternity of forgetfulness of myself
    Living forcefully without the intention of life
    Doomed to solitude, numbness and death

    And so I wrote my despair and desire for not being any more
    Prisoner of fate and false scenarios
    I pretended to live believing in other truths and myths
    A spell of death and violence was written on my heart
    Still not free from the cage of demise and darkness.

    I lived in death, and the death lived in me
    Trusting the undying spirits of deception
    Captivating my heart and soul like vultures
    Avid of my mystery and innocence
    Having been thrown into a cave with no way out

    Slumber was my only loyal companion in my non-life
    Slammed doors and broken windows and screams the constant guests of my trap
    Explosions and metal dust were falling over my realm of nightmares
    Dreaming of not dreaming anymore forever

    Falling into unloveable harbours of uncertainty
    Being unintentional and detached in my survival
    Nonchalant about the future as I was destined to vanish
    Secrets and memories were pinning me down like a fallen butterfly

    I lived in madness
    Pretending to exist in a phantom reality
    Striving to scream but without success
    I’ve been an embalmed doll, trapped in a glass cage
    Untouched by love.

    My heart and lips have been sealed
    By the pins of sovereignty and hegemony
    Waiting to be forever free I feast upon myself.
    Elisabetta

  • Laments in Oblivion

    Laments in Oblivion

    Laments in oblivion faded away like ephemeral tears,
    Becoming crystal gems caught in the night’s dark mirror,
    Where dreams lingered, fragile, on fleeting gusts of wind,
    And relinquished fragments of hope were bound to a silent death eternally.

    Darkness reigned over the realm of light;
    No eternal flame granted lasting life,
    While sorrow bled from noiseless abysses,
    Where forgotten hearts wept in silence and despair.

    The moon’s cruel glow was a mournful gaze,
    Illuminating all that was forsaken, lost in haze.
    Each tear became a star, each sigh a spark,
    Vanishing gently into the infinite dark.

    Spectres swung on a temporal precipice;
    Memories tarnished, turned into mere dusted rhymes.
    Radiant longings became dimmed and pale,
    And, in the chasms of silence, unveiled their tales.

    Ethereal glares and gentle cries of dismay—
    They belonged to the realm of stupor.
    Laments in oblivion were the only vestiges that lasted when remembrances died,
    Tormenting dreams beneath the moonlit skies.

    Dark clouds moved sombre and ominous,
    Crossing skies that never encountered vexation.
    Wanderers hovered among the glooms,
    Guided by phantoms in slumber and reverie.

    Sorrow and delight entwined together,
    In a languor that let the desolate trees weep.
    Lovelorn, broken hearts, once blazing and bright,
    Danced their last waltz in the smothering night.

    Faint glimmers flickered and swiftly withdrew,
    As the night devoured, each spectral hue.
    Memories withered like extinguished flames,
    Leaving only the ash of forgotten names.

    The stars lay imprisoned within the abyss of nothingness,
    Bound by eternity’s sorrowful plight.
    Clinging to remnants of fading light,
    Such glimmers dissolved into shadows in a deathly sleep.

    Laments in oblivion were consumed by the night,
    Hidden in shadows, beyond all light.
    Gone to silence, lost to the night,
    Drifting softly from mortal sight.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • Evanescent Chimaeras

    Evanescent Chimaeras

    Evanescent chimaeras were fragile,
    Like sand castles destroyed by violent tides,
    In the darkness of the night,
    Beneath a starless night sky.

    Lores of lost longings were engraved,
    On every dead leaf intoxicated by the blizzard.
    Fragments of ancient sorrow lingered,
    Frozen in the gusts of a restless wind.

    Shadows stretched like fractured dreams,
    And the moon hid behind a veil of despair.
    Broken mirrors reflected hollow trees,
    Where ephemeral wraiths appeared and faded.

    Their mournful cries dissolved in silence,
    Carried away to oblivion’s edge.
    Serpentine branches clawed at the void,
    Yearning for passions that they had never known.

    While flowers shuddered in the frozen earth,
    Guarding secrets buried deep and cold.
    The realm was endowed with the burden of grief,
    Each sigh was a flake of a dying flame.

    Evanescent chimaeras became crystal gems,
    Sparkling in the night’s relentless embrace.
    A dance of glares and glooms unfolded to disquiet the nighttime,
    In a subliminal fantasy of folly and beauty.

    Time seemed to wither away,
    And every sigh was a dreadful lamentation.
    The sky, an ink-stained canvas torn asunder,
    Seemed to bleed darkness from unseen wounds.

    Stars were but distant memories, fading,
    Like whispers of lost souls slipping into voids.
    Wails echoed through the cold stillness,
    Like ghostly hymns sung for a dying world.

    Mournful notes wrapped around this realm,
    Magic disintegrations obliterated every little light that remained.
    Phantoms wandered aimlessly through the haze,
    Their translucent forms trembled in the cold.

    They traced forgotten paths along the dusk,
    In search of places that no longer existed.
    In the chasm of that haunted silence,
    Evanescent chimaeras turned to dust once more,
    Scattered by the wind, forever vanished.

    Their fleeting dance was a requiem for the lost,
    An elegy woven into the night’s black shroud.
    And as the reality slowly succumbed to oblivion,
    Only despair and sorrow remained.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • A Tragic Fate

    A Tragic Fate

    A tragic fate ruled beneath a mournful autumn sky,
    A forsaken shade stood with a tearful eye,
    And a stare falling upon a distant stone,
    Where memories lay carved in bone.

    The winds had howled low; the trees had bent near,
    Whispers were carried, fraught with fear.
    A tragic fate, so cruelly spun,
    The story ended where it had begun.

    It was a gloomy tale of a life forever paused,
    A frail and fair existence swallowed by despair’s cruel snare.
    The wanderer watched as doom took its due,
    Helpless as its darkness grew.

    A wilted rose lay upon a grave,
    A token of a life once given.
    In nights that wept and days that knew despair,
    Absence haunted in hollow air.

    The earth was consumed, the coffin decayed,
    Life was reduced to memories soon forgotten.
    What solace could the grieving find,
    When death had left the world behind?

    The ravens summoned from their twisted trees,
    Evoked echoes lingered in the bitter breeze.
    Forgotten mortal fragments traced the path,
    To where the silent shadows did laugh.

    A chill resided in every gust of heft,
    Every sigh became a dirge that spoke of death.
    The sky hung heavy, draped in grey,
    As if mourning the world’s decay.

    In every shroud of mist that swirled,
    The darkness deepened, and silence curled.
    Beneath the ground, the roots entwined,
    To claim a body once divine.

    The clock ticked on, though spirits faded,
    Their murmurs were lost where graves were laid.
    And as the night unfolded its veil,
    The air grew thick with a mournful wail.

    Beneath the mournful autumn shade,
    Two souls rested, their debts repaid.
    The earth reclaimed its lost embrace,
    And time forgot each sorrowed face.

    In the gloom, an eerie glare burnt in all its might,
    It kept flickering dimly through the night.
    It wove between the gravestones’ gloom,
    A ghostly waltz, a dance of doom.

    At last, voices from the shadows called,
    They whispered tales of love’s great fall.
    The leaves rustled with each breath,
    Carrying echoes of untimely death.
    A tragic fate was inevitable for the eternity.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • The Ghosts of the Forgotten

    The Ghosts of the Forgotten

    The ghosts of the forgotten wandered near,
    In twilight’s grasp, they did appear.
    Their forms were faint, like fading mist,
    And shadows clung where the light was kissed.

    Their whispers rose with night’s cold wreath,
    Echoes of life were now tinged with death.
    They lingered where the darkness fell,
    Between the world and some lost hell.

    Among the ruins, they found their place,
    Where time had left no single trace.
    The walls were cracked, the stones were bare,
    And sorrow hung upon the despair.

    The moon above, an eerie eye,
    Watched over where the spirits did sigh.
    Its silver light fell upon the ashen ground,
    Gave shape to those who made no sound.

    They drifted through the shattered halls,
    Where faded portraits lined the walls.
    Their eyes were empty, cold as stone,
    Forever trapped, forever alone.

    And in the corners, shadows grew,
    Where dreams decayed, and fear came into view.
    The ghosts would reach with hands of frost,
    Reminders of what once was lost.

    Their laments merged in mournful cries,
    A symphony of endless sighs.
    They sang of grief and silent dread,
    Of restless nights among the dead.

    Nevertheless, in their sorrow, there was grace,
    A haunting beauty in their face.
    For though they roamed in death’s embrace,
    Their longing time could not be erased.

    And as the night gave way to dawn,
    The ghosts of the forgotten were gone.
    They vanished with the morning’s stealth,
    Returning to their quiet and eternal death.

    But among the ruins, still and grey,
    Their presence lingers with the day.
    And all who wander through that place,
    Will feel the chill of their cold embrace.

    A last desire might have been exposed,
    That every whispered secret might remain undisclosed,
    Until the very end of the eternal darkness,
    Where time surrendered to a haunting stillness.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • Echoes of Solitude

    Echoes of Solitude

    The echoes of solitude lingered like ghosts,
    Each sigh was a reminder of what was permanently lost.
    In the chambers of silence, where memories faded,
    I traced the soft outlines of illusions that betrayed.

    Once passionate and secure, my heart knew no bounds,
    However, in the quiet, the many storms overwhelmed around.
    The walls whispered secrets of sorrow and pain,
    Recounting the moments where hope met disdain.

    Each creak of the floorboard evoked a haunting voice from the past,
    Telling of fables and merriments that couldn’t last.
    The portraits that hung on the walls seemed to cry,
    Reflecting my longing, my wish to defy.

    In the heart of the stillness, where time lost its touch,
    I wandered through memories; my heart could not heal from the clutch.
    The enigmas became entangled, too complex to feel,
    A web of lost moments, no truth to reveal.

    I spoke to the shadows, confided my fears,
    Revealing the heartache that flowed like my tears.
    Indeed, in this embrace of the silent abyss,
    I found a strange comfort, a longing for bliss.

    For solitude wrapped me in a stone mansion,
    Where the flowers of anguish began to flourish without caution.
    In the stillness, I pondered the paths that I chose,
    And the weight of my sorrow, a delicate prose.

    Each echo was a lesson, each silence a melody,
    In the chasms of my solitude, I found serenity.
    Though the world outside faded into the mist,
    In the meadows of solitude, I found my true bliss.

    But even in happiness, a cloud remained,
    A reminder of all that could never be tamed.
    For solitude’s comfort is an ephemeral glimpse at best,
    A fleeting illusion that cannot bring rest.

    And so I remain, a soul intertwined,
    Among echoes of solitude, lost to the mind.
    Surrounded by the quietude, I drift like the night,
    Searching for peace, yet bound to the light.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • Hollow Nights

    Hollow Nights

    In hollow nights when the stars dared not shine,
    Dreams wandered through hidden mazes, lost in the pine of yearning.
    The aura, full of gloom and despair,
    Bore witness to nightmares that haunted every tear.

    The moon, a mere phantom, cast shadows so pale,
    Illuminated paths where memories wailed.
    Each rustle of leaves echoed tales of the past,
    Of elation that lingered, of joy that would not last.

    I trod lightly on secret spells, each tale hid behind a soft sigh,
    In the silence that wrapped me, I could only comply.
    The darkness embraced me, a cloak worn so tight,
    As I was lost through the remnants of a once-bright night.

    The trees stood like sentinels, guarding the pain,
    Of lovers long lost and the tears that remained.
    Their branches, like fingers, reached out to the moon,
    As if begging for solace, a fleeting tune.

    In the heart of the night, where shadows conspired,
    I sought out the devotion of a long-dead fire.
    But the embers lay cold, buried under the frost,
    A reminder of passion, of the love that was lost.

    And yet, in this hollow, a strange harmony I found,
    In the stillness that lingered, a gentle, soothing sound.
    Since the hollow nights were filled with the past,
    A labyrinth made of memories gathered.

    So I wandered through Twilight, embraced by the night,
    In the hollow of silence, my dreams faded under invisible clouds,
    Each gust of wind was a ghost of delight,
    In the desolate nights where the stars dared not shine.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • The Embrace of the Void

    The Embrace of the Void

    In the embrace of the void, where shadows entwine,
    I surrendered my heart to the arcane silence.
    Here, in the stillness, all sounds had ceased,
    I found my own peace, but my spirit was leased.

    The night wrapped around me like a lover’s caress,
    With each sigh, I let slip a whisper of grief.
    I wandered through landscapes where no light could intrude,
    Lost in the abyss of a sorrowful realm.

    The stars above flickered like memories gone,
    Their light was just a glimmer, a glimpse of the dawn.
    In the embrace of the void, time slipped away,
    A moment eternal, where shadows held sway.

    I felt the cold raindrops of darkness draw near,
    A shroud woven tightly, instilling pure fear.
    Yet strangely, within this chasm, I discovered a treasure,
    A comfort in stillness, a profound solace.

    For what is the void but a mirror of myself,
    Reflecting the depths of my own anguish?
    I wandered unanchored, yet strangely at home,
    In the embrace of the emptiness, forever to linger.

    The silence, a canvas where thoughts drift and sway,
    In colours of longing, that time can’t allay.
    Each heartbeat was a reminder of love left behind,
    In the void’s deep embrace, my heart was unconfined.

    And so I perpetually abide in this realm of despair,
    Where shadows stroke me, and darkness stands revealed.
    Since, only in the embrace of the void, I am free,
    Forever entwined in this haunting decree.

    In the oblivion, I confront the phantoms that dwell in my mind,
    A haunting chorus of echoes, relentless and cruel.
    In dreams and nightmares, I’m lured into this desolate place,
    Hence, I embrace the infinite darkness, each shadow, each sorrow, each trace.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • The Endless Grief

    The Endless Grief

    The endless grief, born in the deepest shadows,
    Where sorrow grew, and demons crept.
    A silence dazed the eerie aura,
    A weight too much for hearts to bear.

    The rain fell cold, the sky was bleak,
    The soul became frail and the mind weak.
    A distant toll of bells transformed into a choir of cries,
    A dirge for those who dared to wander too far away.

    The endless road of mourning winds,
    Through shattered hopes and twisted desires.
    No company was found, nor voices to be heard,
    Just endless grief that claimed every living creature.

    The endless grief, a cursed refrain,
    A perpetual march through infinite pain.
    The night devoured the light of day,
    And dragged the hearts to slow decay.

    A castle cold, where shadows reigned,
    Sighs echoed in darkened walls.
    A labyrinth with thorns and tendrils of dread,
    Each path was a step closer to the death.

    The stars looked down with a hollow stare,
    Like frozen orbs that did not care.
    Their pale light painted the soil in frost,
    As every entity was bound and lost.

    The endless grief betrayed like a lover’s kiss,
    A poisoned embrace that none could ever be missed.
    It held hearts, it gripped souls,
    It swallowed whole all that was taken under control.

    In twisted woods where no life could have prospered,
    The path led where the cold wind blew.
    The trees, they moaned, their branches writhed,
    Beneath the sky where stars didn’t thrive.

    The river flew with quiet dread,
    A blackened stream for the living dead.
    Its waters whispered as they ran,
    A mournful hymn for what had begun.

    The endless grief, a heavy shroud,
    A curse that lingered like a minacious cloud.
    No dawn would have broken, no sun would have risen,
    No delight could have been born beneath these unlimited skies.

    The realm itself became a monument of stone,
    A place where nothing could make sense.
    The ground would have swallowed every shadow,
    And still, the grief remained the same.

    The endless grief never ended and never will,
    Through disfigured dreams, it wends and bends.
    It buries deep, it scars souls,
    A fate that no one can control at all.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

© Esther Racah 2025. All rights reserved.