Esther Racah Writer & Literary Blogger

Tag: metamorphosis

  • A Spectacular Mirage

    A Spectacular Mirage

    A spectacular mirage manifested before my eyes in a torrid night of discomforts
    Everywhere there was a scalding haze made of phantomatic dreams and delighting chimaeras
    Never a doubt caught me while a storm of nightmares was brewing over the night sky
    And everything was just darkness and infinity

    I only needed to lose myself to discover my real self
    So many times I have climbed insurmountable heights to realise that I had metamorphosed into something totally different
    Like an ethereal shape that would change incessantly without abeyance
    Each time desiring something new

    The different windows of my life had shut and opened
    Disclosing a multitude of scenarios and dreamland
    The sun had conquered me while the moon hid viciously behind a blanket of spectacular stars
    Majestic dreams had always overwhelmed my heart, and I found myself in an ocean of tears and anguish

    Wandering into the forest of bliss and delight
    I had lost myself permanently
    As if I were unable to think and keep sparkles of wisdom in my treasure chest
    Everything was darkness
    Nothing was translucent
    No aid would have reached me in that mayhem
    Every part of my body and heart could feel the great tragedy of existence

    Dreaming of isles and oceans where nothing had sense
    Nor even desiring
    I could feel myself flimsy like a tiny flower carried away by the winds
    At the mercy of the winds and raging storms
    I wandered in confusion, traversing kingdoms and labyrinths
    In a way, I was detached from my longings, and I was eager to embrace new realms and visions

    A spectacular mirage awaited me beyond the shadows of the night sky
    As an enchantment ready to cast a mysterious spell over me
    Not taking care of any concern, I resigned myself to my fate.
    Elisabetta Esther

  • The Spell Of The Blank Mirror

    The Spell Of The Blank Mirror

    The spell of the blank mirror; an invisible chain to a realm that drew me into its clutches. I had recited their arcane enchantment each night while my eyes were hidden by an ephemeral black veil and my lips were crimson from the nectar of my roses. I listened to their hypnotic spell, alluring like a siren song. Even though my eyes were closed, I could see everything and beyond every kind of imagination.

    I had achieved new perceptions, unknown among ordinary mortals. I could see a new realm invisible to humans where my heart was copiously bleeding my soul over a garden of black roses, which were avid for my essence seeking to sip until the very last drop. A sequence of visions took me away from reality. I wasn’t alive anymore, but I wasn’t lifeless either. I had vowed loyalty to the sacred order of magic.

    I could not abide what my own senses had forced me to witness. I saw ghouls feeding their ego with the shallow souls of imbecilic beings. The more I tried to understand myself, the more I felt that the emptiness inside me swallowed me. And the everlasting fire that sustained my heart alive transformed into an abyss of vengeance and fury. I became the night and the night became myself.

    I embraced my descent to the realm of Hades as the most exquisite triumph of my tragic existence. I could taste the poison of the spell of the blank mirror; a tangible proof of my occult sensitivity in perceiving things invisible to human sight. Accompanied by ravens and ghastly vaults, I metamorphosed into an ethereal creature, who no mortal could defeat. I became sacred to the vicious ghouls of the darkness; they carved their arcane symbols into my heart and soul, soaking my heart with their eternal essence.

    I had become infinite and eternal. I had surpassed the stars of which I had now become the only sovereign. I had become the night and the darkness. I had become an ethereal creature, detached from the corrupted world of the mortals. Lightning and thunder celebrated me as the dark queen of the eternal night. I retained all the glimmering light of the luminaries, and I veiled the moon with a velvet shroud made of lace and silk. I didn’t want any light or fire shine in this realm of perpetual nightfall.

    My endearing devils whispered arcane revelations, stroking me with delicate black roses, whose scent of night unfolded in resins and shadowed petals, drifting like smoke through the galleries of my secret and mysterious realm. I indulged in euphoria and dismay, now that my heart had become a holy crypt full of scorn and vengeance. My incubuses and nightmares paid me tributes and praises. All my suffering scars have become hieroglyphics, sigils, pentacles, hexagrams, runes, and obscure seals, etched in dark ink and shadow.

    The spell of the blank mirror vanished like a faint sob in the midst of an impetuous hurricane; it accomplished its mission of initiation and metamorphosis through which I went, leaving me inscribed with the silent glyphs of the unseen, marked by the sigils of shadowy forces, and bound to the eternal drafts of occult supremacy. Crowned and powerful, I sipped a magic elixir from a chalice wrought of relics and raven feathers, and I tasted the obscure bliss of nightmares and granted elation.

    I had disappeared and been reborn as the night and darkness. Every whisper I uttered became a decree for my loyal ghosts, and the scales of justice had finally been weighed in my favour. Fairness had been accomplished in my favour, at the threshold of the Nether Thresholds. And I feasted and reigned with my consecrated coven of beloved witches and phantoms, bound to me evermore.
    Elisabetta Esther

  • Seeking Dreams

    Seeking Dreams

    Seeking dreams in nowhere on a winter night with no stars but only a mystical fog and gloomy clouds. Not even a bird was flying in the leaden and dark sky. Only the clouds were gazing at me like curious observers, and the wind whispered legends of despair to me.

    I signed and dreamed of ocean floors paved with diamonds and stars. I fantasised about mermaids lost in submerged islands, and snow-capped waterfalls on remote cliffs. Time faded away when I was dreaming. Not even the impetuous cold rain could distract me from my nightdreaming.

    Foolishness never abandoned me, while I was consumed by my passionate longings, which brought me to the edge of the universe. Wonderful darkness enticed me, and I summoned my own demons and spirits, surrounded by exquisite midnight flowers.

    Folly and wisdom accompanied me in my everlasting journey to a netherworld descent. Though I have visited heavens and abysses, boundless valleys and inaccessible mountains, I have always ended up at the very same point of origin, namely my archaic abyss of despair.

    Seeking dreams in nowhere on a frosty night with no glimmering lights but only a ghostly haze and dismal shadows. No living creature crept close to me, but only wraiths and eerie ghouls, which kept following me in every abode and realm I dwelled in.

    I foresaw my decay and the obliteration of all my dreams that I had sought for so long in vain. Drowning in the emptiness and losing my heart, became a nightmare of mine under the shape of an incubus visiting my slumber. Arcane verses, evoking a magic spell, were engraved on my soul.

    Scarlet flowers adorned my hair that flowed on my face, while my tears of sorrow soaked the frozen soil. Nightmares and thorns poisoned my never-ending nights, tainting the sky with chaos. Numbed and mesmerised by swirling griefs that never hesitated to tarnish my keenness, I softly succumbed to my unavoidable demise.

    While seeking dreams, I harboured enemies in my soul, fooling myself with obsessions that left indelible marks in my senses. I had to renounce being myself and let the darkness swallow all my desires. In a realm of liminality, I was cast away and compelled to endure agony.

    Abandoned in my dismay, I found no solace. I metamorphosed into sorrow. I became what I had feared the most, the very thing that had damaged my heart. I ended up in loneliness and turmoil, seeing my own reflection staring back at me in fractured and disfigured mirrors.
    Elisabetta Esther

  • Upon The Petals Of Intoxicating Beauty

    Upon The Petals Of Intoxicating Beauty

    Upon the petals of intoxicating beauty, as if it were a marvellous flower, I found my haven of love and dreams. I lost touch with my wisdom and embraced my unconscious desires. Passionate as I was, perpetual flames scorched my heart, where all my most audacious secrets were embalmed.

    The winter storm came suddenly, and it made all my flowers fade to a haze of stardust. Love and dreams rumbled in my heart like thunderbolts. In stupor and wonder, I fell into an eternal slumber, in which I couldn’t suffer or feel despair. Frozen and benumbed, I became a part of a realm beyond time and space.

    Among stars and clouds, I could see the rainbow of my derealization. I was inflamed and frightened by my own trepidations. I attempted to convey my liberty from past chains, as they strove to bring me down into the abyss of misery. What could I have been in other realities I knew not, while I was lost in broken remembrances.

    The frigid breeze unleashed remembrances and released ancient phantoms from my early past. A vortex of emotions stirred inside me, emptying me of all my enigmas. I wished I could understand what was happening in that very moment. Nevertheless, stupor and hallucinations kept me from wisdom and sanity.

    I felt innocent and fierce, although a bitter dread attempted to fill my heart with infinite emptiness and anguish. I celebrated my resentful loneliness as a treasured gift very dear to me. Every feeling overwhelmed me, and I kept freezing. Every cherished devotion made me hide in the most remote haven.

    I started to talk to mirrors even when they were broken. Each mirror whispered words I didn’t wish to utter or hear. I didn’t know who I was. I didn’t remember my past, since I had lost all connection to past ghouls. I couldn’t find out who I was and where I was. None of my questions had ever found their answer.

    Upon the petals of intoxicating beauty, as if it were a poison spell, I found my demise and eternal doom. My fragility induced me to weep, and I screamed into the darkness of the inexhaustible night. My tears engraved every pang upon my face, running down like garnet streams.

    Thorns and brambles wrapped themselves around me delightfully, making me rejoice with euphoria and bliss. In the ecstasy of contrition and mortification, I found my utmost merriment. Lying helpless and disconsolate, I followed the trails of my reveries, hoping in vain to remember my name.

    I dreamed of exquisite flowers and sweet poisons. I fantasised about petals of intoxicating beauty, until dark shadows dragged me into the abyss of obliteration. I might have been cast into a realm of demise, where spirits and underworld creatures offered me festive and joyful torments.

    In dizziness and elation, I was struck by magical starlight and thunder. Upon the petals of intoxicating beauty, as if it were a marvellous flower, I was defeated and cast away. And lost in the labyrinth of my souvenirs, I could no longer distinguish delusional fantasies from my own ruin.
    Elisabetta Esther

  • Spells And Dreams

    Spells And Dreams

    Spells and dreams livened the garden of the night
    My words became ghosts, haunting me like tormenting nightmares
    Even the frost of the winter night couldn’t have awakened me from my eternal slumber

    Indeed, I had fallen under the spell of a vicious enchantment
    Magic ruled my existence, in the shape of books and arcane tales
    I couldn’t avoid attending the alluring visitation that hypnotised me like a magic exhibition

    Delightful flowers fell all over me, and my heart was filled with dazzling delight
    The night dew doused all the captivating blossoms of my garden
    Love would never perish within my heart, as I embodied my untamed passions

    Spells and dreams visited every night of mine
    They came in the guise of phantoms and demons, though they were not always nightmares
    It was a surprising and astonishing fairy tale

    I slowly succumbed to the spirits’ enticing allure
    For I was naïve and oblivious of the consequences
    I let these haunting creatures follow me and enfold me with all their might

    And even if it was mere foolishness, my fate was entangled with darkness and doom
    I was strangely joyous about this bizarre and painful outcome
    Merriment and wisdom faded away, supplanted by perils and folly

    I chose to devote myself entirely to a realm where my heart was all flames and storms
    Where rose thorns pierced me with silent and merciless severity, like feathers of torment
    This garden of mine was no longer a wonderland

    All the flowers had turned garnet
    They drained life from my heart, and I grew weaker and weaker
    I faded from my own folly, consumed by my desires and chasing meaningless longings

    The stars had already been eclipsed by the tempestuous sky
    The shadow prevailed in a bleak and ominous stillness
    I was surrounded by the fierce wraiths of gloom
    Their indifferent gazes traced the collapse of my heart
    And in deafening silence, I remained within my sorrow.
    Elisabetta Esther

  • The Path Of Perdition And Chimaeras

    The Path Of Perdition And Chimaeras

    The path of perdition and chimaeras had become the centre of my past existence
    Having lost myself a million times and having found a new version of myself each time
    I was a creature of transformation and a cyclic universe
    So cast astray I was that I couldn’t recognise myself oftentimes
    It’s too difficult to define and confine ourselves in a label and a box
    Definitely, I never succeed in such a task differently from other mortals

    I was made of fractures and wholeness
    I was made of sadness and merriment
    I was made of splendour and decay
    I was made of beauty and darkness
    I was made of shells and the ocean
    I was made of the infinite and stars

    Nevertheless, I came to a point of no return
    Where I couldn’t go back or appear under the previous shape
    I had become a new creature belonging to the realm of transformation and death
    My pitiful soul was just a dead star that had fallen from the night sky

    I couldn’t recognise myself even if I did desire it so much
    All the mirrors in front of me seemed black as soon as I stared at their sleek surfaces
    Oh, the pathetic anguish I was feeling in my heart!
    Nothing could have alleviated it!
    A stone flower was inside myself
    While I’ve got lost in the labyrinth of thoughts and fears

    And now I was resting on my dried and pale tears made of dust
    Everything appeared so lousy and loud to my delicate eyes
    The world that the mortals had built was too much for me
    And I felt an evanescent feeling of despair and pain

    The path of perdition and chimaeras could have been the product of my imagination
    Or maybe it was just one of my several hallucinations that haunted my dreams
    I will never know it!
    Elisabetta

  • Betrayed By My Own Delusions

    Betrayed By My Own Delusions

    Betrayed by my own delusions
    I imagine being an ethereal fairy in my realm of dreams
    Where no creature could ever perturb my heart
    And I could cry out my soul

    Vain becomes my attempt to remain wise and sane
    Insanity and madness are my new names
    I forget my essence to transform into another myself
    And in this metamorphosis, I’m the ruler of my own kingdom

    Silence is my new favourite language
    I can touch flowers of emotions whose scent bewitches me
    I’m under the enchanting spell that I’ve cast upon myself
    I’m a turmoil of love and death, and no storm can prevent me from my intentions

    Quietude is my favourite to express myself
    I stare at my several reflections in the mirror of disquietude
    And I hide behind the magnificence of my exquisite garden of dreams
    Where I can fantasise about all my envisioned hallucinations

    Because I adore soaking in the fountain of everlasting passions
    As my limitless yearnings for decadence and dissolute emptiness increase at night
    During my delightful slumber
    When I’m betrayed by my own delusions

    Lying in my garden of lush and mesmerizing flowers
    I forget my name and my essence
    And I don’t feel any fear or concern about my fate
    Because I belong to the darkness and oblivion

    The eternal night with starry skies belongs to me
    I become an odd fairy floating freely among her flowers of decay
    I identify myself with decadence and extreme love
    Because I’m wild and a storm of passions

    Melancholy and sadness are my steady companions
    From which I can never separate myself
    And all my blooming flowers wither and fade away
    As soon as I weep for my long-lost innocence

    Betrayed by my own delusions
    I forget myself and I’m left bewildered
    Intoxicated with the poison of my own desires
    Lost in the turmoil of my madness and decadence.
    Elisabetta

  • The Unique And Infinite Shadow Of My Mind

    The Unique And Infinite Shadow Of My Mind

    The unique and infinite shadow of my mind
    Whilst the beauty is flowing in my dreams
    Someday I loved every single thing in each season
    Of which, like this, in this moment.
    For a while, my thoughts have lost all beauty
    As are still one more time so lovely to the beholder
    I love so much to be happy with beautiful visions
    As ideas and words are always to be heard
    Love,
    It might be only a delightful and phantasmagorical
    Nothing can go through my mind before night
    Every day is a picture of the love for my life
    And at first, every metamorphosis should be discovered in a marvel
    At the edges of time
    In the Universe, every tremendous conquest is a journey bound to eternity
    A year becomes a month, a month a day and a day an hour

    The unique and infinite shadow of my mind
    Feeling the utopia while nightmares resurface
    Where I become my own muse with magical powers
    To transform my life, my soul and my endless visions
    Every night I surrender to the tides of oblivion and silence
    Everything is in deep slumber because the storm cannot appear
    Trying to build a mere idea that cannot be found
    Daring to live pretending that everything is love
    When wishes would embrace being born in an idyllic world
    In a manifestation of life and death
    Once all the hopes disappear in an obscene dismal
    Some lives after existence resurface in an eternal bliss
    Lasting forever
    For love only grasp some hearts
    Every free thought enjoys only a limited dash

    The unique and infinite shadow of my mind is nature
    I see the wonder and the worlds in the firmament
    Being the Universe an outstanding creation made of beauty and mystery,
    darkness and light, endless unknown and limited knowledge
    An ancient mystery without days and nights
    My heart discovered poetry in my dreams
    Loving, day by day
    The facade had faded, and names I knew became obscure
    A noteworthy moment in life
    When dates are removed from the time
    And just the shadows are heard, and the day evolves into death
    The time departed from life
    A newly created fantasy left the mind without delight
    Fighting the loss and death
    Although everything became written
    Not a single certitude is destined to return
    And it lies in the profundity of despair and thoughtlessness
    The blades of my thoughts cut my soul into pieces
    And bleeding, I stand helpless.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

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