Waiting for my dreams to wither like dry flowers
Constantly sinking into the oblivion of sadness and dizziness
Unaware of what could happen to my soul
Having lost every hope to save my dreams
Finding my sweet haven in my darkest grief
Slowly avoiding thinking and surrendering to the course of my vicious fate
I let the ocean waves swallow me into the chasms of unconsciousness
To avoid seeing the reflection of my memories in mirrors of shady dismay
The silence of the night lulled me to a deep slumber where I finally could feel peace and gaiety
My idle heart became a frozen stone full of sand and dust
Whilst I wandered in the desolate forest of my fears
Waiting for my dreams to be my only consolation
For I was aware of the evanescence of the stars gleaming in the night sky
Indeed, every single anguish of mine became a tiny leaf that the cold breeze lifted away from my gaze
So quickly was flowing my existence like a tumultuous river that I lost the sense of time
And I remained therefore languid in a garden without flowers or trees
A garden of darkness and shadows where no mortal could find me
My foremost hideaway in which I could flee the hideous threats from the world of reality
I didn’t pay attention to the consequences of my enchanted illusions
Dread and cynicism accompanied me at every step as unwelcome and unavoidable guests
Secrets were locked within me and only nonsense was guiding me in the eternal gloom of my seclusion
In vain I strove to reach out to the moonlight
Nevertheless, I had been cast away too far
Surrounded by nothing but loneliness and bleakness
I was left crying tears made of madness and turmoil.
Elisabetta Esther
Tag: fear
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Waiting For My Dreams
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In The Abyss Of My Thoughts
In the abyss of my thoughts
I felt the shadows of my dark memories
All over my dreams like hunting ghosts
Feeding my fears with their perfidyI felt the chills of my terrible past
Breaking my heart into a myriad of disillusions
I begged my broken mirrors not to bring to life those remembrances
Crowding my nightmares in desolate nights of anguishEverything now seems so different and irreversible
My cries are full of tears of liberation
Even though I cannot escape from the labyrinth of my mind
It feels like my soul aches has become my radianceMy nightmares came to be my companions
I’m unbound from my ancestral ropes
Nevertheless
My soul is overwhelmed with a cloudy trepidationI strive to endure all those ghouls
Surrounding me like unexpected ancestors
Whenever they visit me by day and night
Covering my fragile voice with their scary howlsIn vain, I begged them to definitely vanish
But they came back over and over again
Nothing could prevent them from visiting me
And I struggle to welcome them as welcome guestsIn the abyss of my thoughts
I rely on my hopes to linger like a lost butterfly
While every storm tries to bring me back to the castle of blight
Committed to the solemn oath of silence and forgetfulnessIn vain, I implored all the stars of the night sky to find a haven
Not even the immense ocean waves were willing to listen to my concerns
Whenever my heart aches, it echoes all over the universe
Loneliness evolved into my only safe island of peaceI wished I could continue to live inside my sparkling cloud of illusions
I desired to be the princess of my dream kingdom
However, there I lingered
In the abyss of my thoughts.
Elisabetta Esther -

The Realm Of Absurdities And Contradictions
The realm of absurdities and contradictions
A world of pure bliss and madness
Where dreams get lost and illusions blossom like flowers
And in the abyss of despair and fear,
The anguish held me trapped by their chains,
With which they cruelly clung to me
In their realm of darkness and madness.
I, with all my heart, sought a successful way,
a means to survive those unjust torments,
But in my hands, I could not find
a path of salvation and hope.The chasm before me made me glimpse my death.
My future was marked as if my time were numbered,
as if I could not enjoy the small moments
That touched my mind,
because of torment and the certainty of perishing
overwhelmed my heart and clouded my mind.Shadows surrounded my figure as if they could confine me
to a territory that belonged to them,
scrutinising me with their cold and cynical gazes,
Speaking a language I did not understand
and whispering legends whose secrets I would never know.The sound of footsteps following me
brought to mind all those dreadful encounters
whose wickedness tore away a part
of my veil of innocence and integrity.The sound of out-of-tune music boxes and grotesque melodies
created images of folly and paradoxes,
for I found myself in the realm of absurdities and contradictions
where beauty was usurped by horror
and where integrity was usurped by corruption.In this realm of hanging trees and hieratic statues,
fires and flames burned unquenched
like the brilliant stars in the sky
whirling swiftly in the firmament above me,
illuminating the dry, hooked branches
of a twisted tree beneath whose shadow I had lain.Absurdity had become the sovereign of my fate.
I was now at the mercy of capricious winds and rather contradictory events,
Just as my miserable existence was entirely controversial.
Elisabetta -

The Ninth Seal
The ninth seal
Because the hour was nine. Or almost.
Paris wept softly blue through cobblestones and gaslight.
A monster came,
not with claws nor teeth,
But with wheels,
A chained demon in place of horses,
and the roar of hatred and madness disguised as an engine.He saw me.
He chose me.
He had determined that I had to die by his shameful hand
The madman with the skull face,
The carriage forged in a nightmare,
drunk on fury,
under a wicked spell,
his infernal claws trembling not from fear —
But from the thrill of ending me.And I,
Just a girl in a pale embroidered dress,
Crowned with strands of gold and unarmed,
But not unguarded.For something stopped him.
Something unseen.
A force older than rot,
stronger than rage,
woven from secret whispers and gold light
spilt from my angelic protector gaze.The wheels screamed.
The demons reared.
And time stopped to exist
As the carriage froze inches from my heart.Behind me,
two hags —
with teeth like monuments and gums raw as hunger,
bald as ancient ruins,
laughed as if grace were weakness
and survival, shame.Their laughter didn’t touch me.
I walked on,
not broken.
Not bowed.
My feet were flame and precious gemstones.I passed through death
I passed through judgment
as one who had died before —
and been reborn
With mirrors behind her eyes
and dustless bones.No prayer was spoken.
No sword was drawn.
But a pact was sealed in starlight and crystal blaze.And so I say:
Nine are the circles, nine the keys.
I cloak myself in stone and destiny.
He who looks sees nothing, he who listens hears no sound,
But I stand guarded, armed with beauty,
And no evil enters where nine times I have said yes.
Elisabetta -

Sadness And Longings
Sadness and longings waited for me to return to my nocturnal slumber. Whenever I fell into Morpheus’s embrace, surrounded by shadows and silence, I discovered a new realm of deception and darkness.
Fear and doubts chained me to an existence of emptiness. Time devoured my hopes, and all my delights were destroyed by the storm of oblivion.
I wandered endlessly through the forest of illusions but could not grasp their ephemeral beauty.Each dream I dared to explore turned into ashes and I had become a captive of my own desires, shrouded in the velvet of sorrow and despair. I fled from humankind, seeking solace in solitude. But serenity became a minacious ghoul feeding upon my thoughts.
My sorrow had become too heavy to behold, and I grew exhausted. I was aware that I couldn’t find any tranquillity inside myself. Throughout my miserable existence, I had been drawn to torches whose fire had burned and bruised me.
Sadness and longings were devouring my bleeding heart like famished monsters. I fell lifeless on the cold soil in the middle of the wilderness. I couldn’t find any will to live and I no longer knew what I was.
I lay among the withered roots of dead trees, cradled by a ground that knew my distress too well. The moon scrutinised me with distant apathy, an insensitive witness to my decadence. Not a single echo resounded my name, not even the wind dared unsettle my quiescence.
I was no longer a real creature or a soul but a doomed shadow. A forgotten rhyme in a poem never uttered. I surrendered to the sleep where no dream could deceive me, and no memory could stab me again.
My heart was sealed in the hush of eternity. Sadness and longings no longer belonged to me. I was finally free from all anguish, and I could hover like a shadow in the night, surrounded by bleeding roses and dark clouds.
Elisabetta -

Trapped By My Dreams
Trapped by my dreams, I was living exclusively in my eternal slumber
From which I could not be awakened anymore
Enchanting siren melodies and terrifying cries bewitched my heart
The perpetual candles burning close to my bedside had the scent of deceptionI was no longer frightened by life and society
I felt like the most free and ethereal creature in the universe
And I ventured to remote islands of phantasmagoria
Thunders of insanity crashed through my heartIt seemed that everything was shaking, and a roar erupted
A fierce and wild cry shattered the stillness of my fantasy
The sky split open with flashes of burning glare
As if the universe itself was coercing me to succumb to its chaotic willThe destruction began its monumental obliteration of all my desires
I could not cry or scream, for I had become silent
I was like a hollow vessel lost in its fate while caught in a storm’s violent embrace
My heart, which once burned with ardent passion, was now a feeble flame twinkling like a dying blazeI found myself wandering in the graveyard of my dreams
My heart was bleeding for all the anguish and grief that filled it
I got lost among the fragments of my shattered illusions
While hovering through the ruins of my beliefs and lovesI remained besieged by the ghosts of my fears in the company of bleeding roses
I had lost all my beloved treasures, and all that remained to me was just dust of decay
Condemned to be devoured by the infinite nothingness
I could not see any of my hallucinationsI could not hear any of the enchanting whispers that the wind used to bring to me as a messenger
Forced to be enslaved to death and obliteration
I was no longer trapped by my dreams
And I dwelled in an unending state of sorrow.
Elisabetta -

Elegy Of The Withered Roses
Elegy of the withered roses was one of the hymns carved on my book of dreams
Every time I opened it to flee the reality around me, I found myself in another world
A realm of solace and delight but also with dreadful and disquieting hues
Confused and dazzled, I began to proceed on my walk to the fountain of knowledge
The more I wanted to know, the more I was convinced to know lessMy struggle to understand the mystery beyond a legend so dear to me was overwhelmed by the fear of oblivion
As soon as I desired to open the books, decay trapped me in a state of affliction
And nightmares hunted me like prey, wherever I was, in the garden of desolation
What I’ve never seen before appeared in the mirror of my fate
The truth hurt me like a dagger inside my bleeding heartThe doom of desolation and solitude tainted every delight of mine
Although I was fleeing the reality, I couldn’t find any haven where to rest in peace
Sombre clouds overcrowded the night sky, obliterating all the stars
And the moon emerged immense in her startling splendour
As she was chanting the elegy of the withered rosesI couldn’t understand if the shrieks I was hearing were groans of mockery or laments of sorrow
All I could see was shadows embedded in the roots of dead trees
Twisting like tortured souls in the abyss of perpetual despair
Because after all, every dream of mine was a nightmare In the luminous hush of night
Since my heart was just an imperfect relic of impetuous stormsNothing more could have been mended
The rift between the realm of nightmares and longings had outgrown
My castle of hopes and illusions had crumbled to pieces
Its towers dissolved into mist, and its gates were devoured by stillness
I stood in my loneliness surrounded by the debris and clutching dreams that were turned to dust
As if sorrow itself had rewritten the fabric of my heart.
Elisabetta -

The Abyss of Oppression
The abyss of oppression was a realm of shadows and fear where hope decayed,
And a silent grip began its play, winding in a dark embrace,
And pulling everything into a hollow alcove.In haunted kingdoms, gloomy clouds distressed tranquillity,
The poundage of insanity was so cruel and cold,
That no hope dared to hold dreams and expectations anymore,
While sinking in the deep and poisoned blight of fear.Starlight grew frail like a fragile gem,
In an eerie aura that stained the sky dead,
Beneath, where the sun had lost its way,
Where longings lay cast but ghostly grey.In dismay, sorrow spoke aloud under the oppression’s grasp in endless nights,
When despair rose to heights unknown,
And fragile desires trembled in the invisible void,
The weight of loss bore down, relentless, keen,
As the oblivion feasted on the faint heart’s prayer.In that desolate realm where no light could endure,
And where silence was torn by unheard wails,
Weary hearts, caught in iron chains,
Clung to fragments of memories grown pale.The skies collapsed like a suffocating veil,
Where chimaeras, once shining, dissolved to dust and ash,
And all that remained was a forlorn lament,
As the abyss of oppression drew down in a final crash.The chasm of illusions swallowed every expectation,
Leaving but a decayed vestige of misery and distress.
Every gleam of promise faded into hollow whispers of betrayal,
While enchanting raindrops soaked every dream in a sorrowful mire.In the shadows, spells enticed those solitary dreamers into fractured and senseless ravines of despair,
Trapping them for eternity.
Darkness claimed the last faint gleam,
And despair surged forth like a relentless stream.In this realm of night, the shadows reigned supreme,
Binding dreams in chains, silencing the soul’s scream.
The abyss of oppression annihilated every mirth and delight, beauty and magnificence,
Leaving a kingdom of chaos and insignificance.
Esther Elizabeth Racah -

Fearless Sorrow
A fearless sorrow was the ruler of the realm of darkness and delusions. Not even the silence would have been so successful without it.
Surreal dreams succumbed to the power of deception and fear. Nothing could have been altered, not even the cynical fate, as the grasp of sorrow and despair tore everything.
Sorrow reigned over every corner, like ivy clinging to the shadows, dragging everything into its cold embrace.
The stars themselves blinked out of existence, one by one, as if they, too, had surrendered to the desolation.
Unspoken lamentations filled the gloomy aura, and each sigh was a reminder of the weight of existence.
What once flickered with hope had long been extinguished, leaving only hollow echoes where light had dared to tread.
The horizon, once vibrant with the promise of dawn, now stood still—a jagged line dividing the unknown void from the nothingness below.
Time itself seemed to stretch and warp, losing meaning as the days merged into one endless, suffocating night.
Beneath the ever-looming sky, the earth trembled with the weight of forgotten truths. There was no escape, only surrender.
Shadows crept through every crevice, whispering the secrets of eternity lost to the wind, each moment a fading spectre of what once was.
Wandering souls, trapped between life and death, carried the burden of their broken promises.
Each anathema blossomed as a curse in the desolate landscape, where solemn echoes of laments vanished as quickly as they appeared.
There was no solace, no reprieve in this abyss; only the cold certainty of oblivion awaited, where cries were swallowed by the emptiness.
Even the world had grown tired of misery and despair. The endless night stretched on, indifferent to the mortal pains.
A fearless sorrow consumed all while the relics of longings dissolved into the void, never to return.
Esther Elizabeth Racah
