With a shadowed soul and a heart in pieces,
I proceeded without direction and without refuge
In the vast expanse of works of eternal beauty and magnificence,
In my solitude, misunderstood and isolated,
shunned for my identity,
always having to hide like a creature invisible to mortals,
yet present and alive,
With a heart burning like an unquenchable flame.
Deafening noises haunted me,
And I sought to hide as far away as possible
In a clearing of unquenchable and precious peace.
I dodged mortals, I dodged their wicked and illusory souls;
beings I deemed unworthy even of their glance upon me.
The thorns of my sorrows pressed into my heart,
making it bleed.
It had become like a kind of gigantic sculpture
that radiated pain and the weight of life,
But also ardour and passion.
The envy and jealousy of petty, tainted beings
left traces of filth and decay
upon my veil of protection and innocence.
The sacredness and devotion of my heart
had been contaminated and defiled
by their greed and rotting wickedness.
Their twisted faces bore a grin of satisfaction
and, at the same time, of bitter corruption,
to the point that their faces were disfigured
by sores and deformities,
as if they had contracted leprosy
or some terrifying disease.
My search for untainted love and the sublime had become impossible,
for the shadows of these monsters,
whose cruelties towards me were unparalleled and horrific,
obstructed the view and the landscape
to the point that I could see no more,
And the fog filled my eyes,
And I saw only darkness—
The vastness of oblivion tried to swallow me.
By now, the veils of illusion had fallen to the ground,
And I could see reality as it truly was,
For those bitter disappointments I was experiencing
In those very moments of contrition
had helped me to see those malevolent and dreadful souls
for what they truly were.
With a shadowed soul, I remained abashed,
standing at the edge where hope and despair are mashed.
Elisabetta
