Esther Racah Writer & Literary Blogger

Tag: dreams

  • Teardrops In The Desert

    Teardrops In The Desert

    Teardrops in the desert of chaos and vulnerability were striking my face while the imperious sun was staring at me with its searing light, on the verge of overwhelming me.

    The long summer nights allowed me to indulge in extravagant fantasies since I had always been fond of dreams and rainbows. But, nevertheless, I couldn’t help myself from finding the right direction.

    The sun gave its place to the luminaries of the firmament, and I could perceive the feeble light of a lantern far away floating in the enchanted forest of my impossible dreams.

    I became a shadow of the night and I could see the stars in their eyes, as if I were their celestial companion in the lonely nightfall. Teardrops in the desert metamorphosed into sighs and whispers in the deepest night of my life.

    Without hesitation, I was tempted to embrace the chaos which was embedded in my heart, now that every delusional longing had departed from my dwelling. Hence, I strove for a stance on my fate, but I couldn’t see anything in my crystal ball.

    Even the tarot cards refused to spell the truth, although I had interrogated them so many times as the number of stars. My hymns had been cast away from me as punishment for my quest to obtain that certitude that I never acquired.

    Teardrops in the desert beneath my beloved moon flew like impetuous rivers at the sight of the twilight. Might I have been a brilliant star or a shy planet, I knew not. All I knew inside my heart was the sensation of a precarious destiny.

    As invisible as I became and as untouchable as I pretended to be, I melted in the forest of thoughts and fears as an untamed creature of my own realm made of fantastic dreams and fancy illusions.
    Elisabetta Esther

  • Time Slipped Like Sand

    Time Slipped Like Sand

    Time slipped like sand in the ocean
    Silence amplified my thoughts
    I got lost
    Wandering endlessly in a quest for forgetfulness and balderdash
    Since the day I surrendered to chaos and oddities
    I’ve never realised the intention of my fate
    Without any concern about my purposes

    Whenever I looked at the sky there was always something missing inside my heart
    Maybe it was
    Perhaps it was not
    Or would I have been destined to oblivion?
    Confused while I was tasting the bitter nectar of awareness
    I didn’t pay any attention to my pathway

    That I was lost I knew not
    All I could perceive was the sight of a crimson aura all around me and a prosperous garden of splendid crimson roses
    Ravens and crows were flying all around me together with magnificent butterflies

    Time slipped like sand
    And there was no mirror where I could see an image of myself
    It was like my countenance was invisible to every silver surface
    Nonetheless, my real delight relied on the trepidation of my slumber
    During which I strove to touch the stars while I was vexed by the gloomy clouds

    Abruptly the mysterious songs of nocturnal birds woke me up
    Did I know where I was?
    I believe not and it didn’t even matter to me
    The foremost commodity was that the time slipped like sand in the emptiness
    I had forgotten the voices of anthropoids and their shadows didn’t bother me anymore
    Fortunately for me

    I was fortunate to discover that I had got lost in the wilderness of my dreams
    Indeed, I didn’t need to follow any path any longer
    For I was now more than ever unburdened from both my past and my future
    The candles of expectation had gone out
    The sparkles of desires and love had been swallowed by the night that whispered my name no more.
    Elisabetta Esther

  • Wandering In Oblivion

    Wandering In Oblivion

    Wandering in oblivion with the certitude in my heart that I belonged more to my afflictions than to my desires
    I knew not where my fate was taking me
    The only inevitability I couldn’t avoid was my obsessive quest to follow my dreams
    My fantastic world was all I demanded so impulsively
    And that everlasting flame was glowing intensely into my heart

    I felt betrayed by the time and all the previous events that dragged me into the pit of anguish
    It was real as much as I was breathing, and I couldn’t prevent being overwhelmed
    A huge imaginary mountain was on my chest, for I didn’t realise I had brought such huge exhaustion over and over again for a considerable time, too many times
    Lost and deluded, I chose seclusion as a way to bear that overflowing burden

    So far I wandered that I got lost in mazes and forests, for I was seeking pursuits and chances
    Even though I knew there was no compass guiding me in the infinite darkness of the nights I spent in dizziness and confusion
    Bitter was the dismay that distressed my heart in the loneliest journey of my existence
    Whenever I searched for comfort, I only found sparse, few and far-between hopes for a spark of delight

    The sunlight became bright and dark, creating shadows all over my path, while the moon advanced with pride as the queen of the long nights when my slumber was trembling with fear of the unknown. At last, I could hear the silence whispering presages and tales. Hence, there I was, lonely in my frailty and chaos, never ready for new adventures whilst wandering in oblivion and suspense. I had forgotten all my bygone remembrances as well as my name and my most cherished dreams.

    As long as the moon shone alongside the stars, I could make wishes that shattered at the mountain’s peak. But all fell silent, and I remained in my castle, admiring the splendid panorama before me.
    Elisabetta Esther

  • The Shadows Of My Dreams

    The Shadows Of My Dreams

    The shadows of my dreams vanished in the emptiness of the night when silence dared to whisper obstreperous secrets.

    So much I coveted to let my fantasy free and untamed that I was willing to let the night sky overwhelm me with its mysterious beauty and fearlessness.

    An enchanted castle was my invisible dwelling where I could play hide and seek with the stars. At the same time, the silver moonlight shone through the crystal chandelier of my empty house.

    The light hid behind the dark shadows, and everything seemed more blurred and phantasmagorical

    The further my imagination travelled, the greater was the confusion that ruled my heart, and finally I was finding leisure while obscured by magnificent clouds

    It seemed to live in the realm of dreams and illusions with no quest for a destination, and no interest in a time-bound domain of decrees

    Time had fallen into oblivion, and nonsense became wisdom, for I was no longer obliged to follow the restrictions of shallow humans

    I was the ruler, and I allowed myself to surrender to the shadows of my dreams as if I were unaware of any consequences

    A realm made of shadows and dreams had become my cherished abode where I could sense protection and immortality

    No mortal could harm me anymore or spoil my treasured dreams because I had by then become out of their reach

    Could I have endured those ephemeral circumstances? I knew not, since I had chosen to live in obliviousness to immerse myself in the ocean of bliss

    The night was a valley of tranquillity, and the silence encouraged me to overcome my fear of being unsteady

    Unquestionably, unsteadiness had become my inevitability, and the infinity of the night’s darkness welcomed me in its majestic embrace, full of the shadows of dreams.
    Elisabetta Esther

  • The Forest Of Desires And Dreams

    The Forest Of Desires And Dreams

    The forest of desires and dreams
    An imaginary place existing only in the night
    When my unconsciousness dazzled me, and I had my excuse to embrace every kind of oddity
    Silence couldn’t hush my fantasies
    On the contrary, every fantastic daydream was a gift that the darkness granted me
    Although humans were far from my horizon
    Since the very first day, I had been cast away from their cynical empire made of metal and pollution
    I always felt like a creature made of stars and flowers
    My superpower was inside myself and in the celestial garden that surrounded me all the time
    I became a fairy hovering in the gardens of mysteries and enchantments
    Reality existed only in my dreams day and night
    And I nullified the time that didn’t exist anymore in my realm of sparkling beauty
    Soft melodies enchanted all my fears fiercely
    And I lost every trace of anguish in my heart
    I was fearless and unapologetically insolent
    Midnight unlocked every portal to mythical worlds, only for me
    I had always been under the spell of my own deceptions
    Which didn’t allow me to recover my wisdom
    The scent of extravagant fruits and nocturnal flowers captivated me
    I kept the belief of never desisting in my bizarre journey
    The forest of desires and dreams was my delight
    Whenever the stars enlightened my path
    Each dream of mine manifested in the shape of comets and rainbows
    As I breathed, my heart became bewitched by all the moonlight
    While I never ceased to pursue my quest for treasure chests replenished with glimmering hopes
    I evolved into an enigmatic oddity
    So eccentric and full of impossible dreams
    Nevertheless, frailty never left me
    And the forest of my desires and dreams disappeared like an evanescent cloud in the night sky
    In a realm without sunlight but with a steady and rebellious moonlight
    Where everything was magic
    For eternity and beyond.
    Elisabetta Esther

  • Waiting For My Dreams

    Waiting For My Dreams

    Waiting for my dreams to wither like dry flowers
    Constantly sinking into the oblivion of sadness and dizziness
    Unaware of what could happen to my soul
    Having lost every hope to save my dreams
    Finding my sweet haven in my darkest grief
    Slowly avoiding thinking and surrendering to the course of my vicious fate
    I let the ocean waves swallow me into the chasms of unconsciousness
    To avoid seeing the reflection of my memories in mirrors of shady dismay
    The silence of the night lulled me to a deep slumber where I finally could feel peace and gaiety
    My idle heart became a frozen stone full of sand and dust
    Whilst I wandered in the desolate forest of my fears
    Waiting for my dreams to be my only consolation
    For I was aware of the evanescence of the stars gleaming in the night sky
    Indeed, every single anguish of mine became a tiny leaf that the cold breeze lifted away from my gaze
    So quickly was flowing my existence like a tumultuous river that I lost the sense of time
    And I remained therefore languid in a garden without flowers or trees
    A garden of darkness and shadows where no mortal could find me
    My foremost hideaway in which I could flee the hideous threats from the world of reality
    I didn’t pay attention to the consequences of my enchanted illusions
    Dread and cynicism accompanied me at every step as unwelcome and unavoidable guests
    Secrets were locked within me and only nonsense was guiding me in the eternal gloom of my seclusion
    In vain I strove to reach out to the moonlight
    Nevertheless, I had been cast away too far
    Surrounded by nothing but loneliness and bleakness
    I was left crying tears made of madness and turmoil.
    Elisabetta Esther

  • Sparkles Of Sadness

    Sparkles Of Sadness

    Sparkles of sadness manifested in the gloomy forest of my dreams. Lulled by a torpor of defeat and annihilation, I attempted to traverse a place unknown to me, with astonishment and wonder, yet, at the same time, with a heart steeped in sadness.

    Although the silver moon illuminated this unknown and dark forest, the further I proceeded, the more it seemed that I was losing myself in oblivion and in the abyss of my fears and uncertainties, for it was there that I was rooted; my heart was torn by a sense of suspension into the void.

    Indeed, I was overwhelmed by my nightmares, which slowly revealed themselves in the shapes of ghosts and wraiths, as I proceeded along my uncertain path without a clear destination. My gentle pains, which scourged my heart and disturbed my mind, rendered me powerless in the face of such apparitions.

    Even unwillingly, I had fallen victim to a vicious and infamous game of which I was not the author. And I could not even, powerless as I was, awaken from that fatal torpor, which was defeating me every night, as well as the wind consumes even the most unyielding rock.

    However much I struggled to oppose the oblivion that sought to obliterate me and erase my name, I could find no hold, no aid that might pull me out of those circumstances of affliction and decay. My heart was lacerated and it shed all my hopes like a raging cascade.

    Weeping and pain were the only faithful companions that followed me everywhere. In this realm of sepulchral silence and the sighs of souls that could find no peace, I remained still, awaiting my metamorphosis.

    Ghostly and drowsy, I could no longer proceed and I fell beneath the weight of my own anguish, as if it were made of gigantic, menacing clouds bearing down upon me. And thus I vanished, leaving nothing but a trail of sparkles of sadness and scarlet petals, as if I had never been born, as if no one had ever known that I had existed.
    Elisabetta Esther

  • The Night

    The Night

    The night opens my heart, made of tragedies and memories. Silence remains merely an echo of my anguish.

    Sweet is the thought of losing oneself in dreams when they become eternal whispers. The subtle play of revelations and allusions is a gentle kiss of love and passion that time does not disturb.

    Light and shadow merge into one another, in an absolute love. The flames of the heart feed on the solitude of the soul beneath the starlight that no longer shines to illuminate, but to recall lost memories.

    Endless games between illusion and wonder hide in the darkness of light. My sorrowful and shadowed heart has fallen into the chaos of eternal torpor.

    I am a volcano of fire and chaos, surrounded by shadows of anguish and restlessness. My guardians are magical crows and silent hares.

    In my solitude, melancholy and confusion are my faithful spectres that never abandon me.

    Drowsy and dazed, I find refuge in my silent torpor: the distorted mirrors are the signs of my resignation.
    Elisabetta Esther

  • Dreams And Chimaeras

    Dreams And Chimaeras

    Dreams and chimaeras make me forget my worries and anguish.
    Surrounded by memories, broken mirrors, and interrupted cries.
    I lie languid like a flower stunned by the morning dew.

    Silence is a sweet melody that distracts me when I no longer understand where life is leading me.
    And in the night I hear the sound of loneliness like a sudden omen of abandonment and defeat.

    The darkness paints imaginary landscapes in my mind.
    The sound of the clouds reminds me to forget my name and hang my soul upon the shadows to rest.
    Leaden nightmares drag me down into the abyss of despair.

    Far away I can hear the screams of my fears calling out my name.
    So I take the chance to follow their trail in the obsidian forest.
    Where I try to find my image in mirrors that whisper to me.

    Murmurs of pain and betrayal appear to me as shapes of magic bliss.
    In my madness, I exist as a free bird of the night.
    Closed doors become gates to infinity.
    Forever bound to my lack of reality.

    I live in the surreal chasm to which I will always belong.
    Abysm and love blend like mysterious revelations.
    They own my heart and my soul eternally.

    Imagination guides me toward the garden of illusions.
    I become the most delusional creature of the realm of shadows.
    Love caresses me as gently as a sharp snowflake.

    My heart is in an everlasting pang.
    Foolishness possesses me, as I advance in my wisdom.
    What I thought would have destroyed me gave me a spark of demise.

    I was lost and I was alive at the same time.
    As an inanimate doll with a burning heart.
    The nothingness stared at me in its boundless ferocity.
    Elisabetta Esther

  • Infinite Stairs Of Waiting

    Infinite Stairs Of Waiting

    Infinite stairs of waiting
    The more I wait, the more I feel trapped in the dungeon of anguish.
    The more I climbed the stairs, the more I tried to ascend,
    the more it seemed I was descending downward with no result.
    All of this made me frustrated
    because I could not reach my goal.

    In my stillness I found myself,
    But at the same time, I lost a part of me.
    It was as if everything I had learned
    I had lost and forgotten,
    and everything I did not know
    I had unconsciously acquired.

    Confused and bewildered in a place of nowhere
    I strived to believe in my dreams but all I could do was fall from the stairs

    It was a game of illusion and reality.
    I had ceased to discern what seemed deception from what was truth.
    Both had blended together.
    It was as if there were no longer any meaning,
    and no longer any need to possess the domain of wisdom and knowledge.
    Everything had shattered into the abyss of ignorance and madness.

    And I proceeded on a thin thread between creation and destruction.
    My perplexities and hopes echoed as if they resounded through enigmatic structures, without meaning and expectations.

    Spirits that I could not discern, that I could not distinguish, whispered to me encouragements to pursue. But every time I fell and plunged into another flight of stairs, they laughed, almost as if to make fun of me — and to mock my inexperience and incompetence.

    In solitude I found myself lost, and there I languished like a creature from other worlds, indulging in my languor and melancholy; I was certain that I was towards myself and my image no longer had reflections in any mirror. The staircase was truly infinite like a steep ascent without end; there was neither a beginning nor an end, everything was an infinite perpetuity of distress and anguish.

    Infinite stairs of waiting were my dwelling for eternity, and there I had to… to… I didn’t know anymore.
    Elisabetta

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