Waiting for my dreams to wither like dry flowers
Constantly sinking into the oblivion of sadness and dizziness
Unaware of what could happen to my soul
Having lost every hope to save my dreams
Finding my sweet haven in my darkest grief
Slowly avoiding thinking and surrendering to the course of my vicious fate
I let the ocean waves swallow me into the chasms of unconsciousness
To avoid seeing the reflection of my memories in mirrors of shady dismay
The silence of the night lulled me to a deep slumber where I finally could feel peace and gaiety
My idle heart became a frozen stone full of sand and dust
Whilst I wandered in the desolate forest of my fears
Waiting for my dreams to be my only consolation
For I was aware of the evanescence of the stars gleaming in the night sky
Indeed, every single anguish of mine became a tiny leaf that the cold breeze lifted away from my gaze
So quickly was flowing my existence like a tumultuous river that I lost the sense of time
And I remained therefore languid in a garden without flowers or trees
A garden of darkness and shadows where no mortal could find me
My foremost hideaway in which I could flee the hideous threats from the world of reality
I didn’t pay attention to the consequences of my enchanted illusions
Dread and cynicism accompanied me at every step as unwelcome and unavoidable guests
Secrets were locked within me and only nonsense was guiding me in the eternal gloom of my seclusion
In vain I strove to reach out to the moonlight
Nevertheless, I had been cast away too far
Surrounded by nothing but loneliness and bleakness
I was left crying tears made of madness and turmoil.
Elisabetta Esther
Tag: unconsciousness
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Waiting For My Dreams
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Haunting Nightmares
Haunting nightmares unfolded in the stillness of midnight,
Shadows drifted with restless purpose.
Fear seeped into dreams, creating unseen pathways,
Where the air had been murky with memories of old anxieties.Tree branches, hollowed and distant, moved through the darkness,
Piercing the quiet with an unspoken dread.
Forgotten fears etched their presence,
Onto the silent canvas of the night.Sleep and wakefulness merged,
Each breath was a thread woven into the dark.
In those spaces where time seemed to dissolve,
Terror took shape and form.Fragments of the past whispered and blended into the vast night,
The imagination drifts away, caught in its own creations.
The darkness expanded, swallowing every dream,
Until dawn’s light broke the spell.Even when the day returned,
The echoes of the night persisted,
Shades lingering as reminders of the fragile boundary between reality,
And the infinite realms conjured in darkness.Whenever the chill of night’s grip indulged,
A spectral fragment of fear remained unseen.
Wisdom clashed with madness that clung to the edges of unconsciousness,
A silent relic of the night’s dominion.Stars shimmered faintly, barely gleaming through the abyss,
Their light was a distant hope that was often lost within the gloom.
The silent rustling of leaves became a cryptic hymn,
Murmuring secrets to those who dared to lose themselves in the emptiness.Sinister memories fastened in the labyrinths of thought,
Each was a trace, a reminder of paths once taken but now forgotten.
The weight of invisible realms pressed upon each soul,
Drawing forth shadows from the recesses of the minds.Whispers of the wind carried the scent of forgotten sorrows,
A frozen stroke that traced the spine with its icy fingers.
In the secrets of the night, woven with threads of fear and dismay,
The hearts beat louder, like blasts against the silence.Haunting nightmares encroached as the darkness reluctantly withdrew,
Leaving behind specs of their ethereal presence,
Suspended in the fading shadows.
Vivid horrors receded to the fringes of memory,
Yet their impact endured, a reminder of the night’s grip.
Esther Elizabeth Racah -
The Calmness Of Despair
The calmness of despair filled the firmament
Having despised vanity as a tempest broke
The rain was blowing through the windy clouds
I was not always used to loving dreams
Once known as happiness lapses
I went nowhere for one day
Getting lost in my dreams
Oftentimes falling into a snare of deceit
Empty memories full of tears
An irreverent game of illusions mangled to pieces trust
Sadness stood at the doorway of the street
Among the lies of people staring at itThe calmness of despair was an intense sorrow between life and death
The fear of terror and pain was caught in a mirror
When the darkness obscured the emptiness
A silent ecstasy appeared in my dreams
A light gleam blew upon me like a hectic wind
The storm seemed like a gentle breeze that fades
Grief and pain desired to endure the cold deathless strife
The fury and the howling of the sky dismantled every speck of serenity
Indelebile and invisible amnesia of future mistakes
A silent mystery of undisclosed obsessions hovered
The dizziness of uncontrollable desires fell like frozen raindrops
An obscure fate attempted to escape from fearIn the calmness of despair’s gloom
No thought would have been flung loose
As every idealisation became a crystal inside my heart
And it was impossible to hope and catch a glimpse behind the lids of unconsciousness
None of my perceptions could lead me to deliverance
Being constrained by misunderstanding and obstacles
I had become a mere shadow of my imagination
A creature of darkness and invisibility without mirrors
An infinite dreamscape was soon forgotten in the opalescent darkness
Every time the night shadows fell down in the desert sky
Lost in my dreams to be never found
Whispers and illusions met in a terrible embraceThe calmness of despair in the abyss
New emotions and thoughts had died too fast
As long as time was past
No oracle was allowed to guess
I looked at the future all alone
Before having discovered a labyrinth where I lost myself
And where the pain had healed my wounds
Completely awoken and sunken into a desire for absence
The stillness of anguishes is a melody concealed in the ocean
My dreams were composed of delights and pangs
And everything was captivated by beauty and insanity
Whenever a silent cry faded far away beyond all earthly things.
Esther Elizabeth Racah -
I Forgot How To Smile
I forgot how to smile
In this world of pain and disguise
Masks and phantoms are all around
Barely pretending to unleash the truth
When mirrors reflect sparkling golden and silver bondsI forgot how to be free
Not falling into beautified traps with magnificent ceilings
Listening to the real sound of the wind
Whenever I breathe the fresh air of solitude
Dizzy and bewildered in a maze of deception and pitfallsI forgot how to fly
And cover my eyes with the leaves of souvenirs
Forgetting my name and the soil where I walk on
Nonsense should be my wisdom
Until I recognise the beauty of invisibilityClaustrophobic fears deceive me
Erasing all the strength I own
Striving to filter the misery in the lake where I drown
Silently closing my eyes so that I don’t cry anymore
Choking in a narrow way where I forgot how to screamIn the ethereal, unending, and eternal quest
I seclude myself in the abyss of silence and invisibility
Unconscious and reckless like a crystal in the deepness of the sea
No shadows or mirrors are my acquaintances
With no difference between the day and nightI forgot how to forget
Whilst fleeting the shallow castles of idiocy and phenomenon
Waiting for the paper cards to fold and burn in the fire of fairness
Once more and forever ignoring the ominous dread of depravity
Standing like a small leaf falling on the cold soil of the oblivionI might have forgotten the slumber of my joyful days
When I lived in the unconsciousness of my thoughts
Confident that my soul would be delighted forever in the dimness of the betrayal
Believing that the toxic clasp of doom would have enlightened my life
Having become captive to a terrible spectreI forgot how to smile with a blank mind and closed eyes
I might have been able to travel far away
Once and for all, in the idiosyncratic of my imagination
Deluding myself in glares and wonders
When after all, I dwell in a dark hollow, I claim to be my fortress.
Esther Elizabeth Racah -
A Timeless Emptiness
A timeless emptiness
Out of vision and fear
Afternoon and Midnight
The sun hides in the woods
Sitting still while listening to the wind through the leaves
Like a surreal vision
Words inside of me shine gloomy
In the unseen world of emotions
Feelings have a hidden beauty
Secret and powerful
Like an icy sea of trees
A breath thriving into a silent voice
A perfect sight of unhappinessA timeless emptiness
A sense of being alive and unified
Like beautiful words scattered in the void
I’m a part of my own universe
And I love to make the world feel everything I might grant
So many times with no fear
Very dearly with love for creation
Whenever light grab the truth
Long moments ago
With joy and hope
And a bliss without any delight in mind
Never realised until love does, it feel like flowersA timeless emptiness
May surely live, that ever was found
In reality
Dreams become devoted vows
Which are made of stained beliefs
In a heart filled with everything that could become alive and dead
Remembering all the time to believe and untrust
An eternity that will cease
Whenever life is meant to end
And death becomes true
Like a nightmare finalised
Though no reality should be conceded
In an artwork built from farse and betrayalA timeless emptiness
Like an unquenchable fire
Burning the soul until its extinction
In the unawareness of a feeling of unconsciousness
Understanding that nothing will end but will only transform
Something too big to be caught
My thoughts build my life
With no beginnings and no ends
My heart is at the edges of the intelligible
Where there is no shadow and shine
A reflection of dark feelings and empty senses
Building a ghost island within the soul
And I lie senseless in unwavering dismay.
Esther Elizabeth Racah -
Without Laudable Expectations
Without Laudable Expectations
Without laudable expectations
When bliss overcomes a temporary melancholy
In a disillusioned numbness of the soul
No dream can endure so long time
And everything becomes ephemeral
Every single expectation is kept in a sacred shed
Once all the dreams are swallowed by oblivion
Hollow trees of humiliation stand in front of the ineptitude
Shallowness wandering towards inertia and madness
After the senses have fallen into a deep slumber of unconsciousness
Only dreary expectancies would touch the sadness for just an instant
An instant of sacred anguish that would eternalize every trembling passion
And when the darkness pierces every realm
Every disgrace becomes a blissful solace.
Esther Elizabeth Racah -
An Odyssey Into Folly
An Odyssey Into Folly
An odyssey into folly amid the desert of wit and wisdom
Where the strong blasts of numbness suddenly become hypothetical ideas
An eternal journey into inanity with endless throwbacks to amnesia and regret
When patience bursts into flames, emotions swirl in the dizziness of the senses
Passivity and introspection stand in a motionless gush of hidden secrets
An abstraction of solitons’ senses drowns into unconsciousness
The overwhelming enclosure of dreams’ fatalities sinks into abhorrent brutality of shallowness
A dim glow of a deceitful doozy hides an overshaded kingdom of folly and phlegm.
Esther Elizabeth Racah -
An Inextinguishable Flame
An Inextinguishable Flame
It burns me inside like an inextinguishable flame
The desire for unpredictability and unexpectedness
Passions and dreams induce me to explore my unconsciousness
My fragility and my vulnerability are the shadows of my dismay
The more I know about myself, the more I want to embrace the obliviousness
The more I learn, the more I become doubtful
Whenever I embrace the risk of losing what I care about the most in life
Persistent aches grasp my heart, and I abandon myself to the madness of my senses.
Esther Racah
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Overrated Fears
Overrated Fears
Overrated fears of future declines
As the darkness gives way to the light
In a play of highlights and shadows
In the ambivalence of the unconsciousness
Whilst the desires dominates the senses
And my restlessness feeds my fantasies
I cease to live a present instant
Because I nullified the time
Free and insensate, I can release my impulses
Instinctively I navigate through the deformities of my thoughts
I feel so close to my naive inspiration
And I don’t care to please other’s impression
The nights belong to my poetry
The nights belong to my dreams
When my uncontrolled feelings fiercely flow
Like a wild rushing waterfall
Sweeping away all my fears
And chasing all my dreams
As soon as they become absurd, chimaeras
Whilst they materialise in the sublimity of chaos.
Esther Racah -
A Red Windflower In The Snow
A Red Windflower In The Snow
When difficulties gather around me
I discover my strength in my fragility
Like a tiny red windflower growing in the snow
Disenchantment is my beauty mark
And shyness is my devoted shield
Invisibility is my enchanting realm
I hide in the meadow of the silent words
Which bloom like flowers on a quiet starry night
My unconsciousness grant me an illusionary joy
I love to lie to myself, becoming a fool
It is challenging to look in the mirror of truth
Because the disenchantment would transfigure my soul
And so I pretend that I don’t have anything to worry about
I laugh and dream about being away
In a metaphysical place
And I stop to think because thinking is corruption
I wonder how it is possible to remain in a blissful stillness
Relishing the silly perfection of a life without the capability of thinking
Then there wouldn’t be anything that would deserve so much attention and devotion
My anxiety and grief would become mere memories of a decadent existence
And I would strive to survive like a tiny red windflower in the snow.
Esther Racah