Esther Racah Writer & Literary Blogger

Tag: longings

  • Sadness And Longings

    Sadness And Longings

    Sadness and longings waited for me to return to my nocturnal slumber. Whenever I fell into Morpheus’s embrace, surrounded by shadows and silence, I discovered a new realm of deception and darkness.

    Fear and doubts chained me to an existence of emptiness. Time devoured my hopes, and all my delights were destroyed by the storm of oblivion.
    I wandered endlessly through the forest of illusions but could not grasp their ephemeral beauty.

    Each dream I dared to explore turned into ashes and I had become a captive of my own desires, shrouded in the velvet of sorrow and despair. I fled from humankind, seeking solace in solitude. But serenity became a minacious ghoul feeding upon my thoughts.

    My sorrow had become too heavy to behold, and I grew exhausted. I was aware that I couldn’t find any tranquillity inside myself. Throughout my miserable existence, I had been drawn to torches whose fire had burned and bruised me.

    Sadness and longings were devouring my bleeding heart like famished monsters. I fell lifeless on the cold soil in the middle of the wilderness. I couldn’t find any will to live and I no longer knew what I was.

    I lay among the withered roots of dead trees, cradled by a ground that knew my distress too well. The moon scrutinised me with distant apathy, an insensitive witness to my decadence. Not a single echo resounded my name, not even the wind dared unsettle my quiescence.

    I was no longer a real creature or a soul but a doomed shadow. A forgotten rhyme in a poem never uttered. I surrendered to the sleep where no dream could deceive me, and no memory could stab me again.

    My heart was sealed in the hush of eternity. Sadness and longings no longer belonged to me. I was finally free from all anguish, and I could hover like a shadow in the night, surrounded by bleeding roses and dark clouds.
    Elisabetta

  • Weeping My Heart Out

    Weeping My Heart Out

    Weeping my heart out in the abyss of the night
    While dark shadows embrace me beneath the pale moonlight made of cold sorrows
    Teardrops carve my name, descending like rivers of woe
    I drown in the ocean of nightmares and death

    The stars have ceased to weep, after staring at the moon’s indifference
    And the wind whispers all my beloved secrets
    Singing the anguish that I keep in my treasure chest
    In my garden of grief where midnight rose

    Weeping my heart out in the stillness of a silent night
    When silence and sorrow prom together
    Echoing through the hollow halls of my soul
    And leaving imprints of longing and grief

    The dawn doesn’t dare to graze my tear-stained face
    Because I belong to the clasp of perpetual twilight
    I’m my weakness and chaos of catastrophe
    Being myself the most intemperate tragedy

    I’m darkness and night
    I’m an ethereal creature of the eternal darkness
    An extravagant flower glowing in the gloomy wilderness
    I love to disappear in the most remote places of my imagination

    Weeping my heart out, I find myself in a meadow of deception
    Where I cannot discern anymore what is real from what is delusion
    Hence, I surrender to the uncertainty of my overwhelming fate
    Unaware of my future demise

    I want to avoid thinking, for I live solely through my passions
    In a frenzy of madness and lust, I become a new creature
    An ephemeral ghost bound to a doomed destiny
    Floating between ecstasy and oblivion

    I take delight in dancing with the spectres of my forsaken desires
    Their strokes ignite flames upon my pale skin
    The night sky swallows the forbidden nectar of my tears
    While I vanish into the chasm of my own longings

    No sunrise will encounter me and no dusk will mourn me
    For I belong to the stillness of the midnight’s embrace
    As I become a shadow lost in the labyrinth of time
    A withering shade, devoured by the void within me.
    Elisabetta

  • Secret Longings

    Secret Longings

    Secret Longings
    by Esther Elizabeth Racah

    In shadows deep where silence reigned,
    I wandered once, with hopes long feigned.
    My heart, a vault of secret fires,
    Bore dreams that time and grief conspired.
    A whisper lost within the night,
    I sought the stars’ elusive light.
    But every step, though soft and slow,
    Led further from what I would know.

    The walls of time grew thick with dread,
    Encasing all that once was said.
    Beneath the luminaries, a ghostly plea,
    I carved my name on a memory tree.
    Yet winds would blow, and dust would rise,
    To hide the truths behind my eyes.
    A gaze that lingered, filled with thirst,
    But never quenched, forever cursed.

    For there, within the hidden keep,
    Where shadows walked, and spirits wept,
    I found the longing, dark and cold,
    A hunger profound, too strong, too old.
    A silence hung like mourning’s shroud,
    And in its grip, my head was bowed.
    What secrets stirred within the stone,
    Were mine to carry, mine alone.

    The fleeting glimmer of what might,
    Lay far beyond my dimming sight.
    Yet still, I chased that phantom light,
    Through endless corridors of night.
    The taste of dreams, so near, so far,
    It was lost beneath a darkened star.
    And all that once seemed close, so clear,
    Became a distant echo near.

    In those long halls, where stillness crept,
    The shadows deepened as I wept.
    For what is longing but despair,
    A wish that dies upon the air?
    And though I sought with all my will,
    The void within grew immensely still.
    Each corner turned, each door I passed,
    Led further from the truth at last.

    And now, those fires once bright, once warm,
    Are cold, mere embers in the storm.
    The yearning that consumed my days,
    Fades slowly in the endless maze.
    No solace waits beyond this door,
    Only echoes, nothing more.
    And so, I wander, lost in thought,
    A ghost with longings left to fraught.

  • Twisted Obsessions

    Twisted Obsessions

    Twisted obsessions of failed dreams,
    In the darkened corners of the subconscious,
    Where shadows unleashed dreams unwound,
    A world of obsessions, all alone.

    Whispers echoed through the sordid obscurity,
    Drawing wraiths to forbidden lights,
    A touch, a sigh, a fleeting glance,
    Lost in the thrall of a reckless trance.

    Desires stolen and broken, out of reach,
    Longings hidden, cruel and true,
    Yearning for those invisible chimaeras the day denied,
    In silent, shamed, and sleazy cries.

    Souls that sought what they should shun,
    Minds that ached for the undone,
    In a labyrinth of illusions and betrayal,
    Obsessions took their hidden refuge.

    A tangled web of despair and loss,
    A dungeon where dark passions bred,
    Haunted in a ghostly daze,
    Lost forever in a damning swirl.

    A gloom and spark remained amidst the chains of dissolution,
    On the deepest night, twisted obsessions ensnared all the dreamers,
    In an abyss of despair and fear with no turning points,
    Even if hope was not a lost cause.

    Twisted obsessions of gloomy fates were the cruel rulers of chaotic existences,
    Once again, they were reborn each nighttime,
    Under the influence of an uncertain order of arcane forces.

    Numbness and slumber remained faithful companions of painful reveries,
    Whenever the desire for despair and sorrow trapped every delight,
    In the midst of the chaos and unknown,
    A game of subjugation and delirium.

    Twisted obsessions and sad insanities,
    Danced on the edges of broken hearts,
    Feeding on the remnants of the soundness of mind,
    Spinning tales of endless binds.

    Sighs of broken promises were released,
    Only to fall into the most profound distress of the night,
    Where shadows became the only lonely and friendly essences,
    And the sun’s happiness was out of sight.

    In such a realm, where reality was fractured,
    Dreams and fears became a forest of drear,
    A fictitious masquerade of hopes defiled,
    By the weight of twisted time.

    Indeed, in the heart of this desolation,
    Every gleam of delight faded away,
    Souls were swallowed by the dark embrace,
    And lost dreams continued to fray.

    Twisted obsessions, relentless and cold,
    Fractured every delight into a shattered mould,
    Leaving behind a void where hope had once dwelled.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • The Infinite Darkness

    The Infinite Darkness

    The infinite darkness lay within each dream,
    Exquisitely bounding everything in the void,
    Fair enough to reveal secrets and arcana of realms that never existed,
    In the presence of the absolute silence of stars and luminaries.

    The infinite darkness betrayed dreams and nightmares,
    In their foolishness and ignorance,
    Like a tide rising from an unknown moonless sky,
    A silver and purple firmament whole of unlimited fantasies.

    Soundless clouds of dust and light were ignominious omens,
    Betraying delusional dreams and untamed emotions,
    Speculations of innocence and death similarly doomed wishes,
    Shrouded in the mist of uncertainty and regret.

    Blue glimmers of occult fantasies hid beneath illusionary visions of a blurred realm,
    Granted to infinite and limitless imaginations,
    Without questions or answers in the absurdity of the universe,
    Interruption of every beauty and sublimity.

    In the silence of stars’ eternal gleam,
    Shadowed longings of forgotten aspirations beckoned,
    Where phantoms of memories and forgotten desires entwined,
    Draped in the spectral light of a desolate eternity.

    Each whispered secrets with echoes of timeless despair,
    Lingering in the hollowed expanse of a cosmic night,
    Concealing the truth in a veil of endless stars,
    Crafting tales of sorrow, anguish, and eternal despair.

    Within the abyss of this boundless void,
    Ancient spirits weaved their silent magic tales,
    Bounded by threads of sadness and ephemeral delight,
    In the everlasting trance of the infinite dark.

    Unseen delights guided the ethereal blisses,
    Through realms where dreams and reality collided,
    Where every shadow held a promise and every light a lie,
    In the uncharted expanse of the deepest fears and desires.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • The Unveiled Dreams Of The Night

    The Unveiled Dreams Of The Night

    The unveiled dreams of the night,
    In the imperative silence and desolation,
    Gleamed an ephemeral light,
    Enlightening the vast abyss of nothingness.

    Whispered secrets were soft and slight,
    In shadows cast by starlit constellations,
    A firmament of luminaries, stitched tight,
    Against the cold embrace of emptiness.

    Through veils of time, they faded in flight,
    Their fragile forms defied all limitations,
    With wings of thought, they soared in the emptiness,
    Embracing dawn with ethereal grace and soulful tenderness.

    As morning broke, the dreams disappeared,
    Beyond the reach of mortal contemplation,
    Leaving a trace, a spark, a sight,
    A promise of eternal, boundless bliss.

    Through the realm where fantasies ruled,
    And imagination weaved in seamless manifestation,
    The unveiled dreams of the night, as destiny intended,
    Became the guiding stars of desires.

    In the oblivion where longings were lost,
    They ignited passions of bold determination,
    And from the depths where darkness descended,
    They rose a beacon of illumination.

    At every moment, their essence transcended,
    Through cycles of dreams’ transformation,
    In forbidden mazes where time halted,
    In realms untouched by mortal grasp.

    Across the vast expanse of infinite,
    Where dreams intertwined with illusions,
    They painted the canvas of deception and betrayal,
    In shadows cast by the echoes of their past.

    As promises lingered in the void,
    Tales of mystery and wonder were concealed,
    In the chronicles of fate and death,
    Far from every congenial idea.

    Through hallways of forgotten spheres,
    Where shadows weaved webs of forgotten lore,
    Ancient mysteries lingered in their sombre embrace,
    Time’s relentless march erased their trace.

    In the silent embrace of the eternal dimness,
    The unveiled dreams of the night found solace in their plight,
    Guided by stars of flickering brightness,
    Revealing secrets to the wandering souls in darkness.

    Through unknown games of shadows and light,
    Tales of the night thrived in elusive enigmas,
    Etched in the firmament’s infinite height,
    A symphony played by celestial drifters.

    Beneath the gaze of everlasting flames,
    The dreams, like phantoms, danced with fervour,
    Woven into an invisible maze,
    Until they dissolved like tears in the rain.

    Ethereal sparkles illuminated the void; in their ephemeral space,
    In the midst of the eternal dimness that held no trace,
    The unveiled dreams of the night illuminated the void,
    In their ephemeral space.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • The Land Of Dreams

    The Land Of Dreams

    The land of dreams has no soul
    I am a dream maker
    Not human anymore
    But I live in my truth
    It is a paradise which has always been created
    Never well known so much
    My past was just a lie
    So many times and ways I lived
    Always seeking a place of happiness
    When I find out a world
    I am always striving to live in perfect stillness

    The land of dreams was not filled with darkness
    It is the world beyond and everywhere
    Where nothing is lost in memory
    And the ocean runs over where only truth can be found
    So many secrets which cannot be seen
    In existence, everything is lost in sight
    With the rain to stay like my own birth
    Looking for the beauty in my heart
    Life is not always fabulous and simple
    A unique gift and a loving treasure
    My desires and shadows endure
    With a glance at the dark

    The land of dreams has no name
    Under the misty sky, the wind blows through darkness and fear
    And my dreams never shall now be seen
    Sometimes there is a meaning in the senses
    There is a life beyond destiny
    The stars are out of the shade
    The remembrance I’ve met in the far past
    Too much has been forgotten forever
    I was not somewhere, and the future appeared somehow
    Wisdom is often seen by time or sight
    The world of misery is in its own value
    The soul needs no choice

    The land of dreams is an echo I saw
    And it is already gone and lost
    Empty darkness, I shall become
    Alone in the most sincere silence
    Only the shadows are clear and warm
    So far, long ago, my longings have ceased
    Releasing the past and rejoicing in the storm’s dusk
    Tears without pain
    In happiness and hope
    I rely on my excellent intuitions
    No longer a bliss among my delusions
    Though my soul is uncorrupted in every way.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • Soft Torments

    Soft Torments

    Soft torments from a poison cup
    Like a dream
    I hold my hopes in vain
    My life is in ache with joys and time
    Far away
    It would not be so late
    To light my pleasure at the silent sight
    Before the storm comes
    I may know that life has faded away
    Because I have lost myself
    And still, it’s not fair

    Soft torments of past mistakes
    A burden that I must pay
    Life was past and dead
    It’s time to learn a new world
    Lost time to defeat
    The dust touched my heart
    And memories could save my mind
    To feel just the dreams of the ocean
    Into my inner space
    A soul could be lost on earth
    Cold like dust and dark like rain

    Soft torments of time
    Building my fantasies made of paper and darkness
    The waves of rainfall cannot feel alone in the blue
    In a beautiful state of deprivation
    Stars are full of fears
    As anguish is forever gone
    In the immensity of the dusk
    The cold light of my life has come to wait
    No pleasure was a wonder to behold
    Falling to weep
    When the heart is full of grief

    Soft torments I had achieved in vain
    Silver clouds still glowing in the sunlight
    A remorseless sight of betrayal in the fragrance of the summer
    The melody that stirs death in nature
    Under the light of flashes dropping in the darkness
    In this sky, my soul cannot be filled with a gleam
    An eternal poem about life
    When the gloominess of every thought perishes in new longings
    Whispering words of pain move through my mind
    Sometimes it’s amusing what wisdom can reveal in the empty obscurity
    Once everything disappears from my glimpse
    Drops of flame lure my heart
    Forever and ever.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • The Screech Of Indifference

    The Screech Of Indifference

    The Screech Of Indifference

    The screech of indifference
    The invisible shape of disillusions
    When the caducity of time and entities
    Fall into a throb of hope
    Whilst incorporeal feelings
    Are bent by gusts of distress.

    A deprivation of emotions alters
    Transforming into a blaze of greed and obsession
    The death of illusions breaks the artifice of existence
    Similar to a dream melting into a vortex of torments.

    Decay and ineptitude overcome
    Once the tremor of mediocrity
    Obliterate every sparkle of sublimity
    And silent wretchedness tarnishes every edge
    In the infinite ocean of longings.

    The screech of indifference
    In a state of desertion of the souls
    Longings of burning deceptions
    A surreal and imaginary mystery
    Surrounded by hideous monstrosities.

    Limping shards of a lost whisper
    Disguise in the shadow of an instant
    A gathering of wonders and desires seizes endless anguishes
    When reminiscences dissolve in the ethereal.

    The intangible world of the ideas
    Collapses in the dreary chasm of the metaphysical
    The hesitation of a glimpse of a dream
    Disappears in a hidden spoil of eternal emptiness.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • Blooming Flowers

    Blooming Flowers

    Blooming Flowers

    Blooming flowers
    Blooming roses, jasmines and tuberoses
    In all their beauty
    In my secret flower garden
    All the white and crimson shades
    And the delicate pink hues
    All over the soft and fragile petals of my flowers

    Lost in my dreams
    And forever bound there
    My imagination enslaves me
    As I am enchanted by the intoxicating scent of tuberose and jasmine
    My consciousness becomes a pure illusion
    And my creativity seals the box where I am trapped in
    Trying to forget my past and erase all the memories

    My dreamlike existence becomes my wickedness
    My longings become my fragility
    My soul is a blooming flower
    Which vanishes in a cloud of dreams
    I don’t exist, except in my fantasy
    I desire
    Hence I exist.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

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