Esther Racah Writer & Literary Blogger

Tag: myself

  • The Visions Of My Soul

    The Visions Of My Soul

    The visions of my soul strike my mind
    I never see to end of the motionless disheartenment
    In silence, I wait for a prolonged rain to end
    I know the world will not last forever
    In hope, I live a dreamless life made of disillusions
    Lies in the deepest darkness with no return at all
    Where everything is dim and the night is quiet
    The rising waves and the gloaming break me
    Surprise and wonder echoes seem to be heard from afar

    The visions of my soul fly like a rose
    They are born to face the earth’s fate
    I have learned how to dream
    A new life is present
    Every word is not a mystery
    It is the only way to be
    Unmindful and alone
    I have never known of all the rituals I dreamt
    No one should know

    The visions of my soul go back to the years and life’s past
    A long journey is waiting now for me
    A perfect existence to read
    Though I still enjoy thinking about perspectives
    I’m looking forward to each night with sadness
    Perhaps it has been written without rhymes
    I cannot always be concerned in ways far away too much longer to write
    A very different way to be in art
    I see words as they were assigned to me for the way I exist

    The visions of my soul have vanished in the sky
    And as the birds cease singing in their nest
    At twilight, my memories fade away
    My heart is close to the firmament and yet so free
    The dreams, the air, the sky, the sea, the trees and the earth help me to find myself
    I glimpse the bright clouds and the leaves flying down
    Whilst the stars gleam upon me
    I become free from those old and deceitful longings.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • Blissful Anguish In The Daily Light

    Blissful Anguish In The Daily Light

    Blissful anguish in the daily light
    Waiting no longer
    Life seems like a dream that will break
    Many things belonging to love always end
    From a life filled with sorrow and bliss
    Time ended everything
    And happiness faded away
    How could I feel hope and fear without a soul
    Being my heart a fragment of despair and desire
    Coping the frightful pain stabbing my soul
    When I stare at my reflection on a white wall
    As it would be another me waiting for my end

    Blissful anguish in the daily light
    The silent darkness is whispering secrets
    I’m mute because that is how I live
    Invisible and speechless
    As a constant ghost would check my state of mind
    I might be fearful, but I am not
    My soul has never seen the present
    Being bonded between the past and the future
    Its arrival and its flow
    It shall lead to new things to come
    Hope begins once again
    Until it is crushed into pieces

    Blissful anguish in the daily light
    The truth does not halt in the fall
    I live with wonder
    When there is no need to hide
    Love might give eternal light
    Existence becomes free of grace
    And everything becomes blind
    My thoughts glow above my eyes
    In a perpetual chase for limited emotions
    My mind’s endless glare overcomes me again
    In every moment, a life is born
    A beauty that will be

    Blissful anguish in the daily light
    Losing parts of myself
    The hushed tears of misery
    So brave and free is my mind
    I dare not make a new choice
    For without any joy
    Life is powerful as truth
    When a heart is full of sorrow
    And sorrow goes with it
    Then the soul can be sensed within it
    A sorrowful bliss and unexpected transformation flow down through the darkness
    In dreams, I never die for
    Until I stand there all alone.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • A Shattered Mirror

    A Shattered Mirror

    A shattered mirror on the door
    I am not so happy
    As I’m afraid
    I know
    My life is in despair
    And I want to think
    Yet alone
    So many beautiful feelings
    The day does not fade in silence
    On the night that was coming
    So deep inside of me

    A shattered mirror
    All life’s dreams are lost
    A fantasy about sadness and rewards
    Forever thought
    The time has been lost and has vanished away
    Nothing may end
    starting another life
    Making a way out of happiness
    Grasping another thoughtless truth
    I can’t see how I feel

    A shattered mirror with no name
    I look towards the dreams
    When I was not there
    A stable cold summer breeze
    It seemed to shine as it gazed at my long chocolate-brown hair
    When the nights were senseless, I was covered in bliss
    And the clock was far and dark
    My hopes were nothing anymore
    Feelingless tears were gone inside of dreams
    A lonely and silent night with empty dreams
    Loud were my hallucinations, like multiple images of sorrow

    A shattered mirror flows through my dream line
    A picture is found again
    I cannot see my reflection
    Birds are silent as they can’t breath
    The breeze through the water runs away to some space
    Flying over life with no desires or pleasures
    The terror of thinking makes me gasp
    Now there was none
    Only a single cloud in the dim night
    The beauty of carved and gloomy trees
    I’ve never appeared to be forgotten

    A shattered mirror
    Like a ghost with a broken smile
    My questions have no experience
    A single cry sank into the silence
    Hoping for new visions of eternity
    I cannot see through my thoughts
    I’m lonely, and I dream
    Staring at my reflection in a broken mirror
    Looking for myself with no speech
    Striving to carry the wind
    making sure that I’m still existing.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • The Subliminal Paresis Of My Soul

    The Subliminal Paresis Of My Soul

    The subliminal paresis of my soul
    Oblivion is the poesy of mind
    Vanity and treasures are the paroxysms of nullity
    I began to strive for my hopeless dreams
    Without any intention of conquest
    Disconnected from useless inquiry
    Disintegrated is my soul
    Split in multiple fragments
    In a life hanging by a thread
    The hallucinations devastate me
    Falling into a sunken world
    With the purpose of spoiling every hope of mine
    Transforming constantly into some new shape
    Like an amorphous entity

    The subliminal paresis of my soul
    Shrinking in an unloveable world
    I never felt so nonsensical and translucent
    Like the death inside space
    The universe’s beauty is an image of my thoughts and beliefs
    My spiritual visions are a reflection of the dimness of my imagination
    Nothing but the wisdom of emptiness in the eternity
    Without any proper understanding of the occurrences will happen
    In the needlessness of lives
    Many exquisite moments and memories are forgotten forever
    I will become unknown as I never existed
    Forsaken in a mean destiny
    Time continues to fail inquisitively serene
    Rejecting the day’s eternal night

    The subliminal paresis of my soul
    The blinking of the time passing incessantly
    There is no reason I would not suffer indifference
    Though my mind is pure as well as my heart
    I will always mourn the mediocrity of the material objectification
    That should be a secret of mine
    But I will always express myself until I breathe at the very last
    The truth could be the world’s treasure rather than a shameful blame
    Not too smart enough to sugarcoat the horrid and havoc
    At the end of the eternity
    I will never get lost in another’s perspectives
    As I am changeless and immutable in my perpetual unpredictable disposition
    Nothingness and void are my welcomed companions
    In the darkness of the nights
    When the silence hushes my breath, I shut my eyes, sorrowful.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah

  • The Mirror Of The Memories

    The Mirror Of The Memories

    The mirror of the memories
    It would never be the same
    Time kept the past and grew deeper than everything
    As someone else
    Lost in an accustomed truth
    It became a dream with living memories of every past love
    Pain and grief stand in a forgotten place
    A quiet escape where nothing changed
    Dreams become lost everywhere
    Even after an endless quest
    When the world seems without any hope
    In my memory
    I’ve been so far from what I was
    Maybe it was an illusion
    I thought to seek myself because
    the reality is just dreadful

    The mirror of the memories
    Whose secrets create my dreams
    Which can only be found far away
    In a silent dwelling
    Stretching between existence and nothingness
    Where everything is lost
    Through the anguishes in life
    Forevermore
    The feelings occur like different images
    Seizing a chance to endure
    But it is said for something
    Sometimes life can lead away from the joy
    Time might be a truth that comes across
    The past glimpsed the feelings of love
    So far
    How much do I love to understand those mysteries of my mind

    The mirror of the memories I glance
    And hope to touch with my thoughts
    It has no place in time
    Becoming lost and frightened by the
    the reality that has been forgotten
    Flickering like a sunbeam in a warm spring breeze
    The scenery of a summer that I stare
    For a while
    Feeling what would come into my mind
    Striving to seize happiness day by day
    The marvellous merriment of living
    So I would try to love and be filled with flowers
    Like flying bubbles on a lovely day
    Deeming how life is unique and unrepeatable
    Beyond the beginning and the ending
    In the eternity of darkness and light
    Once everything becomes timeless.
    Esther Elizabeth Racah