The night lies over me like an immense quilted blanket of stars and gloomy clouds
Sweet are the whispers of my dreams that welcome me into their magical alcove
Lost in the depths of my imagination
I continue to wander in the night
Unaware of my fate, I am blindfolded on my uncertain path
Letting the disquiet burn in my heart as if I were a candle in a storm
I wait for the thorns to turn into feathers in my secret garden of mystery
Everything is concealed from my eyes
And I wake up in the haze and turmoil
In front of me only emptiness and the scent of fear
How long could I have fed myself on the illusion of my dreams?
I know not as long as the clouds obscured the stars
I covet fondly the freedom of birds lingering in the firmament
I struggle intensely to catch a glimpse of withered flowers and evanescent butterflies
And the night lies over me again like a layered shroud
Quietly the wind whispers legends and enchantments
Taking me into the fantastic realm of chimaeras and the overworld
Where no mortal soul could be conceived
Since only fabulous creatures inhabit my fantasy
Loneliness surrounds me and hushes my eagerness to lose myself easily in the maze of foolishness
I sense my dreams as the only reality where I am my tangible self
An ocean filled with delusions and empty shells attempts to swallow my awareness
The exquisite scent of roses and magnolias cannot rescue me any longer
Since the oblivion of the night’s desires takes hold of me
It was too late for me to redeem my heart
In the solitude of the dusk
When everything seemed so painfully calm
Alas, could I finally find myself in the lost abyss of my ineptitude?
I sigh and dream
No further wisdom enlightens my vision
Now that the night lies over me.
Elisabetta Esther
Category: Poetry
Poetry is one of my passions. In my blog, I will publish poems which I wrote. Hence I opened a separate category for poetry.
During the years, I’ve read Italian, English, American, and French poems because, during my childhood, I learned those three languages. Only recently, I started writing poetry which I never wanted to publish. I believe that it is very personal to publish them.
Although I’m a physicist, I started to read poetry during high school, mainly in Italian and English. Only home I was reading French books. Indeed, the French language and literature were not in my school program.
Writing poetry is one of the most intimate ways to express feelings and moods. Time to time, I will publish poems.
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The Night Lies Over Me
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Waiting For My Dreams
Waiting for my dreams to wither like dry flowers
Constantly sinking into the oblivion of sadness and dizziness
Unaware of what could happen to my soul
Having lost every hope to save my dreams
Finding my sweet haven in my darkest grief
Slowly avoiding thinking and surrendering to the course of my vicious fate
I let the ocean waves swallow me into the chasms of unconsciousness
To avoid seeing the reflection of my memories in mirrors of shady dismay
The silence of the night lulled me to a deep slumber where I finally could feel peace and gaiety
My idle heart became a frozen stone full of sand and dust
Whilst I wandered in the desolate forest of my fears
Waiting for my dreams to be my only consolation
For I was aware of the evanescence of the stars gleaming in the night sky
Indeed, every single anguish of mine became a tiny leaf that the cold breeze lifted away from my gaze
So quickly was flowing my existence like a tumultuous river that I lost the sense of time
And I remained therefore languid in a garden without flowers or trees
A garden of darkness and shadows where no mortal could find me
My foremost hideaway in which I could flee the hideous threats from the world of reality
I didn’t pay attention to the consequences of my enchanted illusions
Dread and cynicism accompanied me at every step as unwelcome and unavoidable guests
Secrets were locked within me and only nonsense was guiding me in the eternal gloom of my seclusion
In vain I strove to reach out to the moonlight
Nevertheless, I had been cast away too far
Surrounded by nothing but loneliness and bleakness
I was left crying tears made of madness and turmoil.
Elisabetta Esther -
In The Abyss Of My Thoughts
In the abyss of my thoughts
I felt the shadows of my dark memories
All over my dreams like hunting ghosts
Feeding my fears with their perfidyI felt the chills of my terrible past
Breaking my heart into a myriad of disillusions
I begged my broken mirrors not to bring to life those remembrances
Crowding my nightmares in desolate nights of anguishEverything now seems so different and irreversible
My cries are full of tears of liberation
Even though I cannot escape from the labyrinth of my mind
It feels like my soul aches has become my radianceMy nightmares came to be my companions
I’m unbound from my ancestral ropes
Nevertheless
My soul is overwhelmed with a cloudy trepidationI strive to endure all those ghouls
Surrounding me like unexpected ancestors
Whenever they visit me by day and night
Covering my fragile voice with their scary howlsIn vain, I begged them to definitely vanish
But they came back over and over again
Nothing could prevent them from visiting me
And I struggle to welcome them as welcome guestsIn the abyss of my thoughts
I rely on my hopes to linger like a lost butterfly
While every storm tries to bring me back to the castle of blight
Committed to the solemn oath of silence and forgetfulnessIn vain, I implored all the stars of the night sky to find a haven
Not even the immense ocean waves were willing to listen to my concerns
Whenever my heart aches, it echoes all over the universe
Loneliness evolved into my only safe island of peaceI wished I could continue to live inside my sparkling cloud of illusions
I desired to be the princess of my dream kingdom
However, there I lingered
In the abyss of my thoughts.
Elisabetta Esther -
Castaway’s Desires
Castaway’s desires enticed me in the long winter nights, when the frozen branches of hollow trees caressed me softly, as they needed to approach my body.
The scent of burning candles devoured my enthusiasm and reminded me only of my hopeless misery. An everlasting burning desire strove to swallow my heart greedily like an invisible demon.
My insensitive inertia shattered my soul into pieces and I let the devastation take advantage of me. I was born to dissolve and to perish an infinite number of times in endless ways.
Frenzy and turmoil were my loyal guides like flaming torches in the deepest darkness, and they offered me their improper wisdom. I felt alive only because I embodied the distress that consumed me, leaving me in flames.
Indeed, it was true that scorching passion sometimes might have let me fall in love with things that destroyed, and that was what penetrated every part of me.
I was made of fire and glaze surrounded by the cold mist of my dark chamber where dimly lit candles were my only merriment.
The sweet screams of the night recalled to me who I really was. Obsession carved my vein instilling a tainted poison instead of blood. I became a creature of the realm of shadows and wraiths.
I was consumed by my own fantasies and foolish hallucinations. I had become the queen of frenzy among my lost memories of worlds which I once belonged to.
No mortal entity could see me because I was visible only to creatures of my own. There was no transformation in my staticity.
I could perceive the manifestation of my own tempest, like a tiny vessel in a stormy sea. Lost in the labyrinth of my dreams and dread, I was unable to discover the existence beyond time.
The great mystery of seeking my reflection in the immense mirror of life made me realise my nothingness. There was no end and there was no beginning but merely a vague silence clinging to me like luscious ivy.
Elisabetta Esther -
Entangled In My Own Disquiet
Entangled in my own disquiet
I found myself in a state of confusion
Collapsing into a vortex of chaos and despair
I might have been able to overcome my fears
But I was not capable of escaping the lonelinessThere were no mirrors in my secret dwelling
Where candles and shadows were my loyal confidantes
And an absolute silence was soothing me like a soft lullaby
While my sighs hid tears of griefThinking of myself as a tiny leaf in an immense ocean
I was surrendered to fate, ready to be swallowed up in the abyss of oblivion
Lost in a turmoil of obsessions and dismayMany times I wished to escape from the labyrinth of my fantasies
But deceptions were always following my trail
I knew no serenity
Instead, I was condemned to wander endlesslyTime didn’t know me as I existed in a surreal dimension
I belonged to the realm of darkness and obliteration
And I was a victim of the impetuous winds of the long winter nightI felt the discomfort of reality
It was like wearing a sumptuous dress made of thorns and quills
I lived as a doll locked in an airtight boxNo creature could ever perceive me
No creature could ever hear my sobs and sighs
No mirror could reflect my imageI was inevitably entangled in my own disquiet
Although the stillness around me pacified my soul
I didn’t feel any urgency to rescue myself
Indeed, my drowsy heart couldn’t perceive anything anymoreI had no longing, no desire left
I’ve never been in the garden of devotion and love
I’ve always been shrouded in clouds of invisibility
Always surrounded by candles and spiderwebs
Lost in a cloud of incense and blooming night flowers
Elisabetta Esther -
Love Like A Sweet Poison
Love like a sweet poison seeped into the heart, and time no longer existed in the realm of the eternal night. Passion burned as an everlasting flame and it altered into eternal desire.
A tenacious devotion was rooted in a ground made of ice and stardust. And I stood among crimson roses and the nocturnal mist, under the sight of an eerie moon.
The darkness enveloped me like a sumptuous dress wrapped around me. The faraway shadows of anguish and dread were chasing me like ominous ghouls.
I was seeking ghosts that reminded me of lost loves while wandering accompanied by my madness as the only chaperone.
No pang could ever touch me anymore since I’ve been depleted of my heart that was standing on a dry branch of a dead tree, beating loudly like an incessant cry.
My only way to exist was to roam erratically without any guidance. I was already a creature of the world of darkness. I had altered a myriad times in numerous ways.
I had definitely forsaken the world of mortals, with whom I never felt any affinity. I didn’t mind losing myself in that tremendous labyrinth.
As far as I could proceed, I felt the nothingness swallowing me with delight. A storm had subjugated me and shattered my being.
Not even a speck of myself had been kept by the frozen soil, because a whirlwind had stolen my essence. I was held captive by the abyss of darkness and there were no expectations or delusions.
I finally remembered as a long-lost memory that time no longer existed, when love seeped into the heart like a sweet poison. It burned slowly, transforming into eternal desire.
And there I lay down underneath the soil soaked with ice and flames with my heart standing on a dry branch of a dead tree, dreaming fearlessly and ceaselessly like a funerary elegy.
Elisabetta Esther -
Beneath The Light Of A Candle
Beneath the light of a candle
I hid all my sorrows
My crying out loud was the epitome of my shadows
Lying on the wooden soil of my dark chamber
I could listen to the delightful sound of raindrops
My heart had been broken in myriad moments
And I could see it hovering in the sky
Painting the wallpaper with crimson hues
The scent of dragon’s blood incense enveloped me in a thick cloud
I could allow myself to follow my foolish illusions
They have always kept me on the verge of madness
A relentless turmoil would have emptied me endlessly
Fragmenting my soul and transforming it into stardust
I had fallen victim to my own tragedy
Even though I have eluded the burden of grief
All the most beautiful blossoms of my garden had withered
Flowered meadows transformed into a hollow valley of tears and withered rose petals
I had lost all my dearest treasures and a spell was cast over my erratic fate
Crimson and dark shadows were confining me in my infernal dwelling
Haunted by dark memories and vicious obsessions
Where I couldn’t find a sparkle of love and hope
I might have been allowed to see my relentless crypt
There she stood so magnificent and exquisite
A monument to my witlessness and folly
Beneath the light of a candle
I had vanished anonymously
Only glooms and clouds were grieving for me
Under a sky made of glass and pearls
At nightfall
When chimaeras and ghouls gathered
As soon as the moon summoned them
Therefore I had become a creature of the otherworld
A realm of perpetual twilight and wilted leaves
Where wisdom had forever been obliterated
And silence sealed the portal to mortal sight.
Elisabetta Esther -
My Tainted Longings
My tainted longings blossomed from the nocturnal obsessions that sought me in the mystery of darkness.
I was a haunted creature living in a realm of oblivion and decay, feeding myself on otherworldly longing
The havoc within my heart had turned me sharply to agony and darkness. My melancholic unsaid words had become my delicate descent.
My wounded heart suffered silently in darkness like a relentless everlasting flame. A myriad of shadows enclosed me as if they were the souls of burnt flowers.
In this decadent realm, I was the only spell-casting enchantress, so much so that I dared to fantasise that every dream of mine had become a haunting obsession.
I was feeling utterly bewitched, willing to allure whoever crossed my path in the forest of despair and broken hearts.
I had lost my innocence centuries ago, when the stars still showed only their pure, divine sparkle, for now my tainted and fragmenting soul was cast away by the very stars I had loved so tenderly.
My tears melted the frosty soil into a swamp of gloom and dust, my only cherished refuge where I could paint crimson roses and pitch-black ravens.
I had been crowned the queen of ghouls in my phantasmagoria, where multitudes of shadows sought to surround me in endless ways.
What I had been offered was a treasure chest filled with arcane secrets and stardust. I belonged to the kingdom of oblivion and ghastliness.
I could hear the idle wails of souls who had endured torments as severe as relentless thorns.
I belonged to the void, and I had been forsaken by my fate. I was drowning in the infinite ocean of nothingness, and it seemed as if I had never been born.
And that’s how I turned into a restless shadow, among the endless expanses of emptiness.
Elisabetta Esther -
Fluster And Frenzy
Fluster and frenzy
My guardian ghouls
They came to rescue me
During a dreadful slumber
I felt frozen shadows all over me
It was magical and startling
Nevertheless, the fear came to me
I was wandering, lonely and vulnerable
They were chasing me in the dead of night
I could hear their steps behind me
But I couldn’t discern a shadow from a glimmering star
As the clouds had overwhelmed the night sky
While the moon had vanished quietlyWherever I attempted to proceed
I couldn’t find a portal through which to flee from that abode
My gown, adorned with crimson roses and snow, looked after me silently
The creatures of the underworld traced my every movement
It seemed to me that I was mesmerised by their spells
While a chain of thorns entwined my body like a metallic vine
I was an evanescent creature, dissolving into the abyss of decay and despair
Under the indifferent gaze of the stars, cold and leadenSoft snowflakes were falling all over me
Kissing my weary and fragile skin
Trembling and sobbing, I had to face my fears and my merciless fate
No refuge was granted to me
No lovely embrace was going to welcome me
I had lost all my hopes, and my longings were reduced to ashes
I was condemned to wander endlessly in an abyss of gloom
Where I completely vanished, and no memories of my existence were left
Fluster and frenzy were no longer my guardian demons, but the ominous and frightening facets of myselfHow could I have deceived myself so recklessly?
How could I have allowed myself to surrender to demise?
It was so vicious to admit that I had sunk into oblivion ominously
Moreover, my name had been erased from the mortal realm
My longing for oblivion had unexpectedly taken shape
I was ensnared by the oddities I had forged within myself
They swallowed my heart each time I was overwhelmed by an intense passion
I had become the creator of my own descent
Each flame of desire had turned into a thorn of yearning, binding me with devout cruelty
Nothing could have been halted anymore
I was destined to obliteration.
Elisabetta Esther -
Phantasmagoric Fantasies
Phantasmagoric fantasies were my kingdom of infinity and eternity
A divine refuge where I could fly freely like a fairy
Whenever the storms of fear and dismay came upon meI craved love and devotion like a thirsty blossom seeking the rain
Nevertheless, what I could find were relics of forgotten treasures and vessels of mystery
Silence was the only sound I could hear during my lonely and endless nightsMy beating heart was full of spells and illusions, trying to fill the void with silly desires
Although I had whispered my secrets to the luminaries glimmering in the night firmament
I could listen to the time ticking as it slipped like heavy raindropsThe flickering candlelight kept me warm while my heart sank in the gelid ocean of sorrow
For I was exiled to an evanescent world
Where everything was ephemeral and illusoryAs much as I clung to false hopes, nowhere was destined to ever become my beloved secluded niche
For I was fated to wander evermore without any guidance or aimQuaffing arcane potions, I fed my soul with darkness and fire
Perceiving my slow descent into the chasm of oblivion
I became a fierce sorceress willing to face any kind of hazardLost lyrics echoed in my mind as if they were fragments of my memories
The suspense of my fragility made me shiver like a delicate flower under the touch of a frosty wind
I got lost in phantasmagoric fantasies woven in my dreamsFor I was a dream myself, mesmerised by the beauty of my own imagination
Shunning the bitter truth that my broken mirrors insisted on revealing to meI had always been made of illusions, even though my broken heart persisted in loving chimaeras and ghosts, sinking into the infinite abyss of nothingness.
Elisabetta Esther