Nightmares and sorrow blended in a cloud of illusory bliss in a beautiful and enchanting night of confusion and euphoria. I felt a sense of transience and fragility in my ephemeral existence. Torpor and a desire for amnesia dissolved when madness and absolute sublimity prevailed in their entirety. Lost in the darkness of the night, I began to feel overwhelmed by the immense ocean of life while I was but a frail snowflake, which could have been swallowed by the fantastic void. I had never been able to understand how my heart could be bewildered by a fierce dismay while the nocturnal cold breeze left me feeling drained and listless. Bitter and tragic memories manifested themselves with their unwelcome presence. At least silence could soothe me while the night did increase my anguish, which plunged me into a state of tragic wretchedness, as if my inescapable destiny had decided that dreams could no longer be a privilege of mine. Nightmares and sorrow never left my side and they softly whispered truths to me that I would have liked to bury in the abyss of oblivion. No matter how much I sought to escape that storm of restlessness and melancholy, I always found myself back at the starting point, facing my bitter and cruel anguish. Not even the beauty with which I had surrounded myself had sufficed to save me from that abyss of perdition. And so it was that my dreams were reduced to a heap of decaying rubble that not even the night wind would carry away. Time was racing by like a swollen river, while I stood motionless in a state of torment and contrition, unable to find a way out of that labyrinth of futile anxieties. Lost in the vortex of nightmares and sorrow I let events perpetrate their wickedness. I could never ever forget the day all the dreams of mine fell into abysmal obliteration. There was no longer a sunrise in the eternal realm of darkness and decay.
Elisabetta Esther
Tag: oblivion
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Nightmares And Sorrow
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Phantoms And Dreams
Phantoms and dreams were my devoted cronies wherever I was wandering in the darkest hours of the night feeling overwhelmed by ignominious remembrances collected in the world ruled by the evilness of the mortals. For so long, I tried to erase the images my mind pictured for epochs, never doubting my wisdom, even as I stood at the edge of the abyss of oblivion, where everything was lost and vanished into emptiness. Phantoms and dreams followed my perilous path made of traps and betrayals in the disguise of uncontroversial circumstances. No stars could be glimpsed from my point of observation, hence I wandered in dizziness and chaos, since my loyal phantom friends were not capable of signalling me the proper direction. A timeless silence fell all over the gloomy forest like a noiseless symphony that induced me to fall into a deep slumber. A sequence of instants passed swiftly, like a sudden storm, and I found myself nowhere. The more I was aimlessly wandering, the more my mind was filled with nothingness and chaos. It seemed to me to have been losing all that I owned, all at once, and I felt like an empty seashell filled with seawater and sand. All of a sudden I felt seaweed wrapping me up like a marine creature ready to explore the deepest abysses of the oceanic realm. Loneliness no longer took advantage of me because my phantoms and dreams had metamorphosed into magnificent and phantasmagoric chimaeras. At last, all the pangs and anguishes had left my heart, and nothing could have perturbed that state of peaceful bliss, which I discovered in my delightful nightmares. Phantoms and dreams had been replaced by mysterious ghouls and eerie nightmares. Nothing could have awakened me; not even the silver moonlight sparkling over me; not even the glimmering starlight shining in the night sky; for I had become the infinite darkness; eternally.
Elisabetta Esther -
Time Slipped Like Sand
Time slipped like sand in the ocean
Silence amplified my thoughts
I got lost
Wandering endlessly in a quest for forgetfulness and balderdash
Since the day I surrendered to chaos and oddities
I’ve never realised the intention of my fate
Without any concern about my purposesWhenever I looked at the sky there was always something missing inside my heart
Maybe it was
Perhaps it was not
Or would I have been destined to oblivion?
Confused while I was tasting the bitter nectar of awareness
I didn’t pay any attention to my pathwayThat I was lost I knew not
All I could perceive was the sight of a crimson aura all around me and a prosperous garden of splendid crimson roses
Ravens and crows were flying all around me together with magnificent butterfliesTime slipped like sand
And there was no mirror where I could see an image of myself
It was like my countenance was invisible to every silver surface
Nonetheless, my real delight relied on the trepidation of my slumber
During which I strove to touch the stars while I was vexed by the gloomy cloudsAbruptly the mysterious songs of nocturnal birds woke me up
Did I know where I was?
I believe not and it didn’t even matter to me
The foremost commodity was that the time slipped like sand in the emptiness
I had forgotten the voices of anthropoids and their shadows didn’t bother me anymore
Fortunately for meI was fortunate to discover that I had got lost in the wilderness of my dreams
Indeed, I didn’t need to follow any path any longer
For I was now more than ever unburdened from both my past and my future
The candles of expectation had gone out
The sparkles of desires and love had been swallowed by the night that whispered my name no more.
Elisabetta Esther -
Wandering In Oblivion
Wandering in oblivion with the certitude in my heart that I belonged more to my afflictions than to my desires
I knew not where my fate was taking me
The only inevitability I couldn’t avoid was my obsessive quest to follow my dreams
My fantastic world was all I demanded so impulsively
And that everlasting flame was glowing intensely into my heartI felt betrayed by the time and all the previous events that dragged me into the pit of anguish
It was real as much as I was breathing, and I couldn’t prevent being overwhelmed
A huge imaginary mountain was on my chest, for I didn’t realise I had brought such huge exhaustion over and over again for a considerable time, too many times
Lost and deluded, I chose seclusion as a way to bear that overflowing burdenSo far I wandered that I got lost in mazes and forests, for I was seeking pursuits and chances
Even though I knew there was no compass guiding me in the infinite darkness of the nights I spent in dizziness and confusion
Bitter was the dismay that distressed my heart in the loneliest journey of my existence
Whenever I searched for comfort, I only found sparse, few and far-between hopes for a spark of delightThe sunlight became bright and dark, creating shadows all over my path, while the moon advanced with pride as the queen of the long nights when my slumber was trembling with fear of the unknown. At last, I could hear the silence whispering presages and tales. Hence, there I was, lonely in my frailty and chaos, never ready for new adventures whilst wandering in oblivion and suspense. I had forgotten all my bygone remembrances as well as my name and my most cherished dreams.
As long as the moon shone alongside the stars, I could make wishes that shattered at the mountain’s peak. But all fell silent, and I remained in my castle, admiring the splendid panorama before me.
Elisabetta Esther -
The Shadows Of My Dreams
The shadows of my dreams vanished in the emptiness of the night when silence dared to whisper obstreperous secrets.
So much I coveted to let my fantasy free and untamed that I was willing to let the night sky overwhelm me with its mysterious beauty and fearlessness.
An enchanted castle was my invisible dwelling where I could play hide and seek with the stars. At the same time, the silver moonlight shone through the crystal chandelier of my empty house.
The light hid behind the dark shadows, and everything seemed more blurred and phantasmagorical
The further my imagination travelled, the greater was the confusion that ruled my heart, and finally I was finding leisure while obscured by magnificent clouds
It seemed to live in the realm of dreams and illusions with no quest for a destination, and no interest in a time-bound domain of decrees
Time had fallen into oblivion, and nonsense became wisdom, for I was no longer obliged to follow the restrictions of shallow humans
I was the ruler, and I allowed myself to surrender to the shadows of my dreams as if I were unaware of any consequences
A realm made of shadows and dreams had become my cherished abode where I could sense protection and immortality
No mortal could harm me anymore or spoil my treasured dreams because I had by then become out of their reach
Could I have endured those ephemeral circumstances? I knew not, since I had chosen to live in obliviousness to immerse myself in the ocean of bliss
The night was a valley of tranquillity, and the silence encouraged me to overcome my fear of being unsteady
Unquestionably, unsteadiness had become my inevitability, and the infinity of the night’s darkness welcomed me in its majestic embrace, full of the shadows of dreams.
Elisabetta Esther -
Fluster And Frenzy
Fluster and frenzy
My guardian ghouls
They came to rescue me
During a dreadful slumber
I felt frozen shadows all over me
It was magical and startling
Nevertheless, the fear came to me
I was wandering, lonely and vulnerable
They were chasing me in the dead of night
I could hear their steps behind me
But I couldn’t discern a shadow from a glimmering star
As the clouds had overwhelmed the night sky
While the moon had vanished quietlyWherever I attempted to proceed
I couldn’t find a portal through which to flee from that abode
My gown, adorned with crimson roses and snow, looked after me silently
The creatures of the underworld traced my every movement
It seemed to me that I was mesmerised by their spells
While a chain of thorns entwined my body like a metallic vine
I was an evanescent creature, dissolving into the abyss of decay and despair
Under the indifferent gaze of the stars, cold and leadenSoft snowflakes were falling all over me
Kissing my weary and fragile skin
Trembling and sobbing, I had to face my fears and my merciless fate
No refuge was granted to me
No lovely embrace was going to welcome me
I had lost all my hopes, and my longings were reduced to ashes
I was condemned to wander endlessly in an abyss of gloom
Where I completely vanished, and no memories of my existence were left
Fluster and frenzy were no longer my guardian demons, but the ominous and frightening facets of myselfHow could I have deceived myself so recklessly?
How could I have allowed myself to surrender to demise?
It was so vicious to admit that I had sunk into oblivion ominously
Moreover, my name had been erased from the mortal realm
My longing for oblivion had unexpectedly taken shape
I was ensnared by the oddities I had forged within myself
They swallowed my heart each time I was overwhelmed by an intense passion
I had become the creator of my own descent
Each flame of desire had turned into a thorn of yearning, binding me with devout cruelty
Nothing could have been halted anymore
I was destined to obliteration.
Elisabetta Esther -
Ensnared In My Own Obsessions
Ensnared in my own obsessions, tricked by my own illusions, I wandered, lost in the abyss of my fantasies. Nightmares were lulling me to sleep on a winter night, while soft whispers were revealing terrible truths to me.
Time was slow like my heartbeat. I couldn’t cope with my anguish. It was a massive pain that devoured my heart constantly and slowly. Slow was the time. Slow was the consistency of all my pangs inflicted on me.
Far away, I couldn’t perceive any clear horizon because respite was cast away from me. I could have cried; I could have screamed; I could have broken free from every cruel distress, no mortal soul would have ever noticed it, in the realm of sugary masquerades and coffee goblets.
Overwhelmed by the sense of oblivion and nothingness, I begged my fate to make me forget my bitter and sad memories, in an attempt to save myself from destruction. Teardrops of crystal ran across my face until they fell into darkness in the absolute silence of the eternal night.
And I finally sipped the very last drop from my toxic goblet. I could feel my heart fracture in all its power, and my body shake with bliss and delight. I embodied my decay fiercely, and flames engulfed me impetuously.
Shadows captured me viciously with their menacing claws, ripping my heart to fierce sparkles of passion. Shivers of euphoria and panic coursed through my mind, and my body was under the influence of a magic spell.
The void claimed me as if I were a creature of its tragic realm. That immortal doom seized me in a dungeon where no starlight could penetrate. I hesitated and sighed in the midst of the nocturnal haze, which hid the deception of my dreams.
Ensnared by my own obsessions, fooled by my own delusions, I strolled in the chasm of my daydreams, although I was confused. I couldn’t feel loneliness anymore because of my imagination. I couldn’t discern anymore what was real and what was not.
I strove to feel calm and so much wished to be a star glowing in the sky among clouds and moons.
I aimed to be infinity and emptiness. My heart became a labyrinth of frenzy and murkiness. I was longing to be taken away from my hallucinations.And I wailed to the firmament a multitude of times over, though I knew that no creature was willing to hear my laments. Wicked ghosts cast a spell over me, mesmerising me, and I surrendered to their shadiness, mistaking it for deliverance.
Elisabetta Esther -
A Shallow Melancholy
A shallow melancholy caught me in the labyrinth of torment and insomnia. My heart was pierced and disheartened by senseless whirlwinds of despair and anguish.
I didn’t know where I was headed, but I could only feel a tremendous intimidation inside myself. A vast, gloomy shadow wouldn’t allow me to see beyond the horizon.
I had no destination, and it seemed that I had no free choice to escape from that doomed fate of mine. The haze was so dense, and the night was so dark that I couldn’t find any portal to allow me to escape.
I screamed to the stars, but they refused to listen to my voice, and I was cast away from their gaze for eternity. The everlasting darkness granted me the utmost agony, and sorrow lulled me to a fatal slumber.
Although I cherished my dreams, they vanished into the ashes of decay. Solitude and loneliness had spellbound me with their sombre and mournful enchantment.
In a mystic aura, I was viscously bound to a magical realm of lost spirits and wicked wraiths, which whispered their laments to my ears.
I knew not who I had become and what my name was. So much confused and chaotic was the state of my heart that it sank deeply into the abyss of havoc.
I fell into ecstasy and bliss, enjoying my decay and every pang bestowed upon my heart. Hurt and frantic, I shed tears of bliss and elation.
My sobs and sighs broke the solemn silence that remained my most loyal companion in that kingdom of demise and chagrin.
Frenzy distressed me, and turmoil shattered my heart. I embraced the bitter emptiness, hovering like an ethereal creature in search of magic vaults and secret forests.
And there were no beginnings nor ends in the domain of the shallow melancholy. I dangled from spectral threads that drew me into my perpetual disintegration. And I lay there, claimed by the hereafter.
Elisabetta Esther -
Upon The Petals Of Intoxicating Beauty
Upon the petals of intoxicating beauty, as if it were a marvellous flower, I found my haven of love and dreams. I lost touch with my wisdom and embraced my unconscious desires. Passionate as I was, perpetual flames scorched my heart, where all my most audacious secrets were embalmed.
The winter storm came suddenly, and it made all my flowers fade to a haze of stardust. Love and dreams rumbled in my heart like thunderbolts. In stupor and wonder, I fell into an eternal slumber, in which I couldn’t suffer or feel despair. Frozen and benumbed, I became a part of a realm beyond time and space.
Among stars and clouds, I could see the rainbow of my derealization. I was inflamed and frightened by my own trepidations. I attempted to convey my liberty from past chains, as they strove to bring me down into the abyss of misery. What could I have been in other realities I knew not, while I was lost in broken remembrances.
The frigid breeze unleashed remembrances and released ancient phantoms from my early past. A vortex of emotions stirred inside me, emptying me of all my enigmas. I wished I could understand what was happening in that very moment. Nevertheless, stupor and hallucinations kept me from wisdom and sanity.
I felt innocent and fierce, although a bitter dread attempted to fill my heart with infinite emptiness and anguish. I celebrated my resentful loneliness as a treasured gift very dear to me. Every feeling overwhelmed me, and I kept freezing. Every cherished devotion made me hide in the most remote haven.
I started to talk to mirrors even when they were broken. Each mirror whispered words I didn’t wish to utter or hear. I didn’t know who I was. I didn’t remember my past, since I had lost all connection to past ghouls. I couldn’t find out who I was and where I was. None of my questions had ever found their answer.
Upon the petals of intoxicating beauty, as if it were a poison spell, I found my demise and eternal doom. My fragility induced me to weep, and I screamed into the darkness of the inexhaustible night. My tears engraved every pang upon my face, running down like garnet streams.
Thorns and brambles wrapped themselves around me delightfully, making me rejoice with euphoria and bliss. In the ecstasy of contrition and mortification, I found my utmost merriment. Lying helpless and disconsolate, I followed the trails of my reveries, hoping in vain to remember my name.
I dreamed of exquisite flowers and sweet poisons. I fantasised about petals of intoxicating beauty, until dark shadows dragged me into the abyss of obliteration. I might have been cast into a realm of demise, where spirits and underworld creatures offered me festive and joyful torments.
In dizziness and elation, I was struck by magical starlight and thunder. Upon the petals of intoxicating beauty, as if it were a marvellous flower, I was defeated and cast away. And lost in the labyrinth of my souvenirs, I could no longer distinguish delusional fantasies from my own ruin.
Elisabetta Esther -
Whimsical Chimaeras
Whimsical chimaeras blossomed in my garden of extravagant flowers and frantic trees. When the silent valley of dreams was crammed with forbidden hopes, the stars never hesitated to shine. In my delusional fantasy and secret inner world, I could be free from mortal dogmas, made of aberrant rules.
Many nights I have wandered, embracing my silliness and bizarre turmoil. Foolishness was my only state of mind, and every portal could unlock for me. I wept, and I sighed, as if it were my only way to express myself. The cold night wind hushed my aching heart, filling it with fear and torment.
The snow painted the soil with white crystalline hues, while my slumber had kept my heart from aching more copiously. I had lost the capability to listen to melodies, but all that I could hear was a fanfare chanting demise and downfall. My whimsical chimaeras had transformed into shadows and darkness.
I had become a stranger in my own realm, which I couldn’t recognise any longer at all. I felt like I was deprived of all my delusional dreams, which I considered my only comfort and sweet haven. No candied flowers or chocolate-coated leaves prospered in my garden, which was now nothing but a land of frost and thorns.
The reality had transmuted into a sharp sword, depriving me of every longing, for I had lost my strength to escape from that snare of descent. Melancholia burnt my heart, altering it into an everlasting torch. I encountered no compassion or tenderness, but pointed hooks of indifference and hatred.
My heart was wrapped in thorns and quills, and it suffered copiously. Unbearable pangs crossed my body, inflicted by misery and dismay. Shallowness was prevailing, and what appeared noisier and phonier had replaced what was pure and magnificent.
Darkness, together with the moon and the stars, was a cynical witness to every single occurrence. Silence had sealed my lips, and I was no longer able to utter a single sound. Definitely, my whimsical chimaeras were just a remote memory of my shattered mind.
I was burying my dreams and my hope a long time ago, and fell victim to my delusional fantasies and absurd expectations. I was conscious of my decadence and that I would soon embrace my final demise. In that exquisite garden of bygone flowers, I lay in wait for my very last moment of mortal essence.
Elisabetta Esther